Sennin Guardian Rikudo
by AMD Productions
Summary: Over 20 years ago, Tobi was finally defeated. Naruto must now put his faith in the next generation–and a legend before he was a legend. Between terrorists, youkai, old prejudices, and an ancient prophecy, will this kid, locked out of his own time, be able to help save the future and, more importantly, find out why he's here? "I seriously doubt it." "Shut up, Kurama!" OCs-not Sues
1. Prologue

**Title: Sennin Guardian Rikudo**

**Genre: Friendship, Adventure, Romance, Comedy, Action**

***Warning for character death, implied non-con, and implied incest.***

**A/N:**

_Ash: This is our little group project. It's taken years, but it's finally here. Appreciate it, brats._

_Melon: She doesn't mean that last bit. You're not a brat, you're a lovely reader who decided to take the time to read our story, and we thank you for that!_

_Ash: And many thanks to 'Bloody Prince,' Belphegor's character song. Without that song, I could not have finished this as nicely as I did._

Disclaimer: None of the above own the manga, anime, spin-off of, characters of, or franchise, _**Naruto**_. If we did, there's no telling what any of us would've made the characters do. And it's for the best that you never know.

* * *

**Prologue**

_A man laid on the ground, taking deep, heaving breaths as the pool of blood underneath him grew. Beside him lay a half smashed white mask with a spiral design. Nearby stood a beat-up teen with whisker markings on his cheeks. He stared down at the dying man as he held onto his blood soaked arm._

_Tobi chuckled weakly. "Nice job breaking it, boy. Demons now roam the earth! None of them sealed or controlled by anyone! Have you any idea what you've unleashed on this world?"_

_The boy clenched his fists and muttered under his breath, "I understand better that you ever could." Louder, he growled at the dying man, "I know that I've gotten rid of something far worse. The world no longer has to fear you destroying anything or anyone. We're finally free of you."_

_"Ha! Do you really think it matters? There will still be strife and mistrust. There will still be wars and betrayal. There will still-" Violent coughs interrupted him, blood splattering his chin. He greedily sucked in air once they subsided. "There will still be people like me in this world," he finished hoarsely._

_A solemn wind blew, ruffling the teen's blonde hair. Before Tobi took his last breath, Naruto raised his head to look him in the eyes._

_"I know that. But..." he suddenly grinned with that familiar determined glint in his eyes, "You should know by now that I NEVER give up!" Naruto straightened himself to his full height as Sasuke and Sakura, supporting each other, neared him. "They can keep coming, they can keep trying. We'll win every time, and we'll prove you wrong!"_

_Naruto's left eye turned crimson red and the pupil lost its round shape to form a slit. The marks on his left cheek thickened, and the teeth on the left sharpened. Two voices came from his throat. "We'll prove you wrong about humans AND demons. Just wait and see."_

* * *

A blonde man wearing a red hat sat atop a face carved into a mountain, a gentle wind blowing the veil of the hat behind him.

_Twenty years have passed since that fateful day we won the Fourth Shinobi War and I got my best friend back._

_We've all grown up, and while some of us have changed, others don't seem to changed a bit._

An ANBU wearing a snake mask landed behind the blonde and watched him silently, waiting. The man smiled gently without turning.

_Can't say I'm complaining about that._

_The world has evolved over the years, and yet, in some ways, it seems like it hasn't changed at all. The great nations are finally at peace with each other, or as at peace military superpowers can be with one another._

The blonde chuckled to himself as he gazed west of the village, past the forest just beyond its walls.

A small two-tailed cat wearing a wispy scarf sat in the branches of a tree just below the man, watching a scruffy kitten with her tail cut off. The two-tailed cat looked at the man above and seemed to smirk before turning and gliding down to the cute kitten.

_And demons are now a regular part of our lives, though acceptance is still a work in progress. But the biggest change isn't what I had expected as a kid._

The man leaned over his propped knee to peer into the village streets, a childish grin overtaking his face. Young teens ran through the streets as others leapt over the roofs and slid along convenient rails. A group of pre-teens chased after a horrifyingly familiar cat with a bow on its ear. A boy with triangle markings yelled at a pineapple-haired man that looked half asleep.

_It's this. We're no longer the driving force behind Konoha. Our time is over, and we've passed down our will of fire onto the next generation. And just like us, they'll surpass everyone's expectations and create a shining new future._

The blonde stood up, dusted himself off, and turned to grin at the ANBU with the strangely spiked blue-black hair. The wind carried his voice as he spoke to his old friend. "It's their turn now."

* * *

A girl landed on the sturdy branch of tree. She sucked in a calming breath, only to freeze at the thump of someone else landing. She glanced back quickly, feeling the furious gaze of her best friend boring into her. With a shriek, she took off, the other girl immediately tearing after her. Leaves were knocked from their perch and sent spiraling to the ground.

But one leaf stayed in the air, gliding along the current above the bustling village below.

* * *

"Oi, Hiruzen."

A broad-shouldered young man looked behind him to look for whomever had called him. "Ah, sensei. What brings you here?" he asked the older man as he edged past a couple middle-aged women fighting over a cantaloupe.

"I told you not to call me that anymore," he reminded Hiruzen as he eyed the women warily. He'd put money on the pregnent, pink-haired one.

The younger man smiled. "My apologies, Shikamaru-san." He cast his dark red eyes back down to the produce he was inspecting. "But you didn't answer my question: what brings you here?"

"Food's gone bad again," the pineapple-haired man answered nonchalantly as he picked up an apple to scrutinize. "You?"

"Groceries for Mother. She likes the fruit from this market."

"Why, aren't you a wonderful son!"

Both men looked up at the old woman manning the stall. Hiruzen smiled pleasantly at the woman. "Thank you, ma'am, but isn't it just what anyone would do for their mother?" As the woman gushed over his manners, Shikamaru rolled his eyes and muttered under his breath.

"Whatever. Tell Kurenai I said hi."

Hiruzen told him he would and paid for his things, complimenting the old woman and causing another round of gushing, before bidding his former teacher good day and heading back through the crowd, which parted like the sea for him.

As a group of girls huddled together and stole glances at him, the man pushed his dark curls back from his face, inciting bright blushes from them. Hiruzen pretended not to notice and smiled at them, diamond dust and sunlight glistening in the background.

They never had a chance.

Shikamaru shook his head and went back to his shopping.

* * *

A pretty blonde walked down the steps of her home into a shop filled with flowers and an older blonde behind the register. She paused to caress the petals of a water lily before speaking to the other blonde.

"I'm going out," she informed her mother.

Chokyume looked up from the sales book and a proud look came across her face. "That's my girl! Keep up the hard work, Kairi-chan!"

The girl stiffened and hurriedly turned away. "Right."

* * *

"Gai-sensei!"

"Lee!"

"Gai-sensei!"

A bushy eyebrow twitched as the shaggy-haired teen tried to ignore the scene behind him. He didn't want to see the sparkles in their eyes, the tears running down their cheeks. And he most definitely didn't want to see that goddamn convenient sunset outlining their embracing silhouettes.

The crashing of waves mixed with the two men's cries.

Yuu covered his ears and wondered why he was surrounded by overly affectionate grown men.

* * *

The adventurous leaf drifted over the walls surrounding the lively village and into the seemingly endless forest.

* * *

A boy with red triangles marring his cheeks crouched on the ground with his hand planted in between his feet. He was practically steaming, and a tiny, dark-haired girl was doing her best to calm him down.

"I-I'm pretty sure s-sensei didn't _mean_ to ignore y-you, Yasha-kun!"

"The hell he didn't! I could see that expression on his face! It screamed 'How troublesome!' In monotone!" he screamed at the sky. At hearing no reply, he turned to the pale-eyed girl. "Geh!"

The normally sweet and understanding girl was inching away from him as fast as possible. "I-I'm just going t-to get... flowers! I'm j-just going to be g-gone for a little bit!" She turned and ran.

"Kimiko, wait!"

* * *

"You will come back here this instant, Hyuuga Kyouya!"

Footsteps pounded the wood floor, going as fast as possible without actually running.

"Like hell!"

The sliding door was slammed open, revealing a young man with short, dark hair and defiance set in his features. He rushed out of the sitting room and towards the front gate.

A man with dark chocolate locks reaching near his waist and a body nearing its 40s hurried after him, expression thunderous.

They made their way past the training yard, where a young man identical to Kyouya, only with much longer hair, paused in his practice to watch them.

The elder Hyuuga reached for his difficult son. "Show some respec-" A small dragon formed from water hit him smack in the face, soaking the man.

Sputtering, Neji called out, "Stop him!"

The other boy nodded and moved to stop his twin, only to freeze at the glare Kyouya sent at him. Without pausing in his steps, he gave a warning to the other young man.

"Don't get involved, Tomo." And with that, he left.

* * *

A dark-skinned blonde walked into a round office, followed by three teens, coming to a stop in front of a desk where a huge black man with only one arm sat. Outside the windows behind him, many narrow mountains covered in buildings could be seen.

"You called, Raikage-sama?" the blonde asked in a dull tone.

The one-armed man pointed to the right at a map on his wall. "I want Team Omoi to take care of some pests."

"Pests?" one of the teens wondered under his breath, keeping his gaze on the ground and letting blue hair obscure his face. He let out a yelp when the only girl in the room elbowed him and turned to glare at her, only to grimace at the glare she directed at him, a lethal combination of "Shut up, you insect" and "How can you not get it, fool" showing visibly. Musha really was a champ at destroying your self-confidence.

Omoi glanced over at his student and explained, "Bandits, Taro."

The last of the teens patted his friend on the back, sending a comforting smile his way before turning his attention back to the Raikage.

"You leave for Akamori Village at dawn," the huge man ordered.

Omoi nodded and, with his team, left the office.

* * *

A freckled brunette sat on a bench outside the animal shelter, cheerfully eating a sandwich. A shadow passed over her, and she looked up to see familiar boy with transparent sunglasses glancing around the sky warily. She smiled.

"The pens are on the other side. Don't worry," she assured him.

He sighed in relief and turned to her. "Thank you, Fi Fi-san."

The girl pouted. "I keep telling you not to be so formal, Shizu-kun!"

Shizu ignored her in favor of looking up as two teens flashed by, amusement coming across his features. "I had come by to ask if you had seen my teammate, but it would appear I've already found her."

"Hm?" She looked around quizzically, trying to find whom he was looking for. A chuckle drew her attention back to the Aburame.

"It would appear she has incurred Uchiha-san's wrath again," he explained while pointing at two distant figures leaping in the direction of the village entrance.

Fi Fi caught sight of the two and giggled.

* * *

"You're New Moon stance is crooked. Adjust."

Gold-green eyes flickered towards the cold, aqua gaze of his mother before refocusing on his sparring partner, shifting his left foot further up to match his left hand. A snort of approval was the only sign that he had of being correct. He grimaced at the wrongness of the position, and began to panic as first his left, then his right leg started to wobble.

He shot a pleading look towards his mother, to which her only response was a familiar frown that he _hated_ seeing. His opponent took advantage of his distraction to attack. The man lunged, twisting to swing his fist at the side of the teen's head.

Caught off guard, he moved to dodge, only to lose his balance. The man took advantage of the moment aim a powerful kick at his exposed side, one that was sure to cause some serious internal bruising if something didn't change–fast.

His eyes sharpened, the pupils shifting to a slightly less round shape. Without thinking, he twisted his body towards the ground and regained his balance. Knowing that kick was still coming, he kept twisting around and slammed his left foot into the man's supporting leg, knocking him off his feet. As he fell, the boy extended his leg to clip his opponent's chin before spinning on his remaining leg away to stand firmly on both feet–one further behind in preparation to lunge–facing him.

"Enough, _Ren_."

He froze at the harsh voice. Sure footsteps echoed in the courtyard as his mother made her way towards him–and he knew it was towards him. She came to a stop a few feet from them, just out of his line of sight.

"_What_ was _that_?" came the question, demanding an answer he couldn't give. Not one she'd like, at any rate.

He resisted the urge to shrug. "Instinct, I guess."

She didn't even bother responding, choosing instead to walk away with the quiet order for his opponent to pick himself up.

He bowed his head, green bangs covering his eyes as familiar words resounded in his head.

_"You must always be in control."_

_"You must think through each and every decision you make, from on the battlefield to during clan meetings to even choosing what to have for breakfast."_

_"Do not ever act thoughtlessly, boy."_

Thumps on the nearby roof jerked his attention away from the memories. He looked up and a smile tugged at his lips as a familiar orange and black blur leapt further away. Another blur, this time blue, landed on the roof and leapt after the first one.

Ren shook his head with a chuckle before heading back inside.

* * *

Two men sat behind the stand at the entrance to Konohagakure, one wearing a bandana, the other with a bandage over his nose, and both with goatees. They grinned at the young man walking towards the gates.

"Yo, Uchiha-san!" called Izumo, waving at the boy whom was currently walking with his eyes closed, head tilted slightly upwards, and hands inside his pockets.

Said Uchiha opened his dark eyes and looked at the two men as he neared. Pausing in front of the stand, he cast an amused smirk at the lighter-haired man.

"Please, Izumo-san, try something besides my family name. I feel like people are addressing my father with they call me that," a gentle, husky voice admonished him.

Izumo laughed. "Oh please, the day that bastard speaks as politely as _you_ do is the day I call him Uchiha-san."

The bandaged man smirked at the twitching lips as the younger fought to hide his amusement at his father's expense. His eyes skittered over the lines around the Uchiha's nose before a shout drew everyone's attention.

"Hi, Itachi-sempai, bye, Itachi-sempai!"

Two blurs sped past the three, so fast that they had to shut their eyes against the wind in their wake.

Kotetsu peeked an eye open and froze, wide-eyed, as he saw Itachi pull his long hair out of his face and hold it back against the wind. He felt a sense of deja vu, and he wondered to himself, not for the first time, if reincarnation wasn't just a myth.

* * *

Twisting and turning through the thick forest, the leaf continued on its journey. A sudden rush of wind sent it bursting through the trees into a clearing that, despite the sun shining directly over head, seemed to be literally tinted with darkness.

The leaf loop-the-looped its way to the center where a stone shrine resided, finally coming to rest upon the top.

* * *

A redhead wearing a maroon coat sat in a similar position to a certain blonde, resting on the wall of his village and looking into the cloudless blue sky. A relaxed whisper escaped his lips, and he let a smile grace them when a breeze gently blew into his face.

His brother landed next to him on the wall and heaved an exasperated sigh. The redhead glanced his way, his smile shifting to an amused smirk.

"Sori?"

Kankuro rolled his eyes as he crossed his arms in frustration. "How'd you guess?"

The only response was a near-silent chuckle.

"I just don't understand that boy, Gaara. I came into his room to ask for his help repairing Karasu, and all I found were designs for dolls. Dolls!" he shouts in disbelief.

The Kazekage glanced behind him at the village as his brother continued to rant. His pale green eyes widened minutely in interest, and he turned his head to get a better look at the spectacle below.

"And when I finally find him, do you know what he's doing?"

Gaara answered drily, "Putting on a show?"

The brunette sputtered. "Wha?" Following his younger brother's gaze, he turned and peered into the gathering crowd near their section of the wall.

At the center danced two small, beautifully made puppets, seemingly by themselves. A boy in his late teens with dirty blonde hair, playing a cheery tune on his flute, spun between the puppets and gestured for people to join in. The puppets reached out to small children near the center and pulled them into the dance. As the children laughed and danced, the crowds clapped in time with the music, other instruments joining from random bystanders.

Above the crowd, the two men watched the performance grow more lively.

Gaara laughed quietly, finding the sight enjoyable. "Say what you will, Kankurou. Your boy has a wonderful talent."

The older man grumbled.

* * *

"GET YOUR BUTT BACK HERE, YOU LITTLE BRAT!"

"DO I LOOK STUPID TO YOU? ON SECOND THOUGHT, DON'T ANSWER THAT!"

A sixteen-year-old girl decked out in black and orange hurriedly pulled herself up higher with a tree branch, trying to get further away from the pale girl. She pushed hard off the branch, forcing it to break off and almost hit her pursuer. The other girl caught the projectile and crushed it in her fist, teeth clenching as she sped up.

"Seriously, it was just a joke, Rei," she tried to reason as she desperately kept out of the raven's murderous grasp.

"You made me look like a complete fool in front of Hiruzen-sempai!" came the enraged reply. The teen was catching up to her dearest childhood friend. Her dearest childhood friend who was about to be beaten to death once she got her hands on the brat. "Get _back_ here, Tsuki!"

"Like hell!"

The first girl hit a nearby trunk and rebounded off it, sending her in another direction and putting a little more distance between her and the other, if only for a short time. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed an area of particularly dense greenery. Suddenly dropping to the ground, she swiftly forced her body into a roll that sent her under the brush and away to the other side.

A muffled curse told her that the evasion tactic worked, and she grinned, raking a hand through her purple-violet hair. Quickly pulling herself to her feet, she started running again. As she ran through a patch of sunlight, a tingling sensation enveloped her. She gasped, and it felt as if she was doused in water, the prickle disappearing.

* * *

Grey eyes blinked open. Or it felt like they were open, at any rate.

The bearer of the eyes tried to peer into his surroundings, but saw only darkness. No light reached him, and he jerked his head around to try and get some sense of where he was. At least, he tried to.

He tried to lift his left leg up, but it refused. He attempted to twitch his fingers, and was denied again. He endeavored to move his damn lips, only to meet failure _again_. His eyes widened in dawning horror.

He was stuck–in this same place, this same position. And he couldn't even scream.

He tried to take in his surroundings as best he could, but something was wrong. There was no smell; not of his cage, not himself, none. And it was as if he was trapped underwater, because nothing could reach his ears, not even the sound of his own breathing.

Panic enveloped him.

* * *

A crashing sound reminded Tsuki of the danger she was in, and she continued running.

Out of the brush burst Rei, teeth gritted in frustration and eyes blazing. She ran after her target, only to slow down as a gasp escaped her, the same prickle that her best friend experienced crawling across her skin. Without her consent, energy rushed to her eyes, causing them to shift from grey-green to a deep, crimson red.

And like Tsuki, the tingling disappeared as fast as it came, leaving her feeling as though something had literally washed it away.

She shook off the strange feeling and raced off after the other girl, determined to catch her and get out of this forest.

But suddenly, Tsuki disappeared from her line of vision. The red-eyed teen froze, trying to sense where the delinquent had hidden. After a few moments of silence, she gave a soft "tch," then closed her eyes and slowed her breathing. When she opened them, the three tomoe surrounding her pupils began to spin. She caught a flash of black and orange some distance away in the trees, almost unnoticeable had she not used her bloodline. Giving a smirk, she chased after her target.

A moment later, the pursued girl crawled out from a hole underneath the large tree Rei had been standing not three feet from. She paused, carefully listening for any signs of her best friend still being in the area. When she heard nothing, she heaved a sigh of relief and grinned in victory.

"Now, back to Konoha for some super spicy ramen!" she crowed happily. But a frown pulled at her lips and her brow furrowed. "But what was that feeling I had before?"

She blinked and looked around her. "For that matter, where the hell am I?"

Nothing looked or felt familiar, and that worried her. She searched for any sign that might point her in the direction of her home, peering deep into the forest.

Tsuki turned and saw what might be a clearing in the opposite direction she'd sent Rei. Thinking that she might recognize a landmark, the teen hurriedly headed that way. As she broke through the line of trees, she had to blink at the strange darkness covering the area. _'What the- I could've sworn it wasn't that late?'_

* * *

A soothing light came to his eyes, brightening his surroundings and calming him somewhat, though he couldn't say that the sight of stone walls exactly comforted him. The smell of dust and mold would've bothered him more if it were for the fact that, _hey, he could smell!_

He could vaguely hear something outside his prison and tried to call out to it, only for his lips to still not work.

His eyes narrowed.

So, there was more to this than a simple imprisonment.

Another sound alerted him to the being outside moving, and he begged in his mind for them not leave him in the darkness again. As if it heard him, the being seemed to get louder, proof that it was getting closer to him.

* * *

To the purple-haired girl's disappointment, the only thing notable in the clearing was a small stone shrine in the direct center of the clearing. There was nothing to familiar about the area or the shrine, leading her to the inevitable conclusion that, yes, she was totally lost. For lack of anything else to do, she walked up to the shrine that, upon closer inspection, was actually completely enclosed, with no openings to speak of. Whatever was inside wasn't coming out

"Well, if that isn't the stupidest thing," Tsuki remarked, her voice loud in the silent clearing. As she took a closer look, she brushed the lone leaf resting on top.

* * *

He sucked in a breath at hearing the voice. _'It's a person!'_

His hope rose (and did it seem to get brighter in here for a second?), and he prayed that person figure out he was here and set him free.

And then a comforting warmth enveloped him, reaching every part of his body. _'My body!'_

He brought his hand to his face, his eyes bright with having recovered his ability to move. He took a deep breath, pushed his back against the stone behind him for support, and raised his foot.

**BOOM!**

* * *

Tsuki noticed the engraved kanji on a smooth slab where the opening would've been and peered closer at it to read. "'Rikudo?' What the heck is tha-"

Out of nowhere came a dark blur that plowed her into the shrine.

**BOOM!**

The ensuing explosion, unknowingly from both sides, destroyed the shrine and caused dust to billow up from the impact. It cleared to show Rei standing with a foot planted firmly on Tsuki's back.

"You didn't actually think that would fool me for more than a minute, did you?" the now black-eyed girl growled down at her best friend.

"Did you have to kick me through a freaking shrine? Holy _crap_, that hurt!" the ambushed girl complained, rubbing her head as she rolled out from underneath her attacker's foot.

When she looked up, she gaped. Rolling her eyes at the stupid look on Tsuki's face, she moved to kick her, but whirled around at the sound of shifting rock. What met her gaze had her gaping too.

A dark figure was pulling himself out of the rubble, groaning. After dusting his–rather old-fashioned–clothes off, the previously buried male turned to look at them. They took the chance to inspect him more closely.

In front of them was a silver-haired guy that couldn't be older than 18, even with that freakish height and the muscle they could see rippling under his clothes. A pair of intense gray eyes stared back them from a face even gods would envy, a strong chin and a fine nose complimenting a lightly tanned complexion.

Those very same eyes expressed amazement and gratitude.

Before Tsuki could begin to ask what the hell the guy was doing inside a freaking ancient shrine, the mysterious man dropped to his right knee and resting his forearm across the left, bowing his head.

"You have freed me from my prison, and I am forever in your debt. How can I ever repay you, miladies?"

* * *

**A/N:** Please direct to our main FF account to see more information. We will be opening a blog site if we get good feedback from the story. The blog will introduce more detailed information about the OCs, as well as pictures.

Thank you for taking the time to reading this chapter. We hope you look forward to future chapters as well.

Ash: The prologue's done. ~collapses~

Melon: Hey, you still have work to do! ~shakes exhausted Ash~

Dill: Yeah, you still have to finish Chapter 1!

Ash: ~groans~ Slave drivers. I hate you all.

Dill and Melon: Read, Favorite, Alert, Review!

Ash: Just friggin' do _something_. We're showing Dill the ropes of writing, so feedback can only help the learning process. If you didn't like it, tell us why. If you did, why the hell didn't you say so?


	2. Chapter 1

Ash: Well, this took so excessively long it's not even remotely funny.

Dill: Blame her, not us... well, her life, anyway.

Mel: These dialogues are so lame...

_Disclaimer: We–in no way, shape, or form–own the __Naruto__ franchise. Just the plot, future setting, and new characters._

* * *

**_ Sennin Guardian Rikudo _**

**Chapter 1 **_  
_

**.**

**.**

**.**

"…"

The girls could only stare in disbelief as the young man remained in his kneeled position, patiently awaiting their demands. Minutes passed. A tense silence filled the air, the sound of the forest still having not returned.

The girl on the ground narrowed her blue eyes for a moment before, without looking away from the boy, grabbing her friend's ankle and yanking her off her feet. A yelp resounded in the clearing, followed by a thud.

"What is wrong with you, you moron?!" was screamed in her ear, right before a fist met the back of her head, pushing her face into the ground.

Tsuki tried to speak, but the dirt filled her mouth and muffled her words.

The other girl looked at her in question. "Say that again."

The teen's shoulders lifted and fell in what could only have been a sigh. She pointed with one hand towards the fist still planted on her head and made a shooing motion with the other.

Getting the message, Rei obliged, allowing the other to push herself off the ground into a sitting position and rub her sore face.

"Ow... That bruise is so going to suck," she muttered, wincing at the twinge her jaw gave. She was lucky it hadn't completely dislocated. That had not been a fun experience, and she prayed she'd never have to repeat it.

An 'ahem' drew her attention back to the other girl, whom had her arms crossed as she glared expectantly at the teen.

Oh. "I was trying to see if maybe this was your genjutsu or some other equally lame trick." Her eyes widened in horror. "Or did I get sucked into one of your fantasies where you get a boy slave and do unspeakable acts of bon-"

SMACK! Tsuki saw stars. A hand clenched the collar of her shirt. _Uh oh._ The dark haired girl yanked her forward, so that mere inches separated them.

"Speak of that again, and I'll destroy every last Ichiraku coupon in your wallet," she growled lowly.

The thoughtless teen paled at the threat and nodded slowly to show she understood.

A strangled gasp took their attention away from each other and back to the boy they'd completely forgotten. He was staring at them like he was afraid they were going to kill him right where he stood, pale grey eyes wide with a mix of awe and apprehension.

SAMISBETTERTHANDEANFREAKINGD IEMELON

He really wanted to look up, but that might reveal his discomfort, so he stayed stock-still. If there was going to be infighting, that just meant he'd only have to fulfill the debt to one instead of two. Although...

"...sucked into one of your fantasies where you get a boy slave and do unspeakable acts of bon-"

He was starting to feel just a small kernel of worry nestling itself in his chest. Maybe he could just utter a quick prayer under his breath for his pride's sake?

At the sound of flesh impacting flesh once more, followed by a wounded whimper, he couldn't help it. He looked up.

And he nearly regretted being free from his strange prison.

One of his saviors had to be the most indecently dressed woman he'd ever seen.

She seemed to be wearing an odd pair of boots made from an unusual type of gray leather, a scrap of leather pulling her bangs back from her face, and a set of long blue gloves that almost reached her shoulders. Her actual outfit was what scandalized him the most; a cloth of some dark blue material covered her torso, but not much else, and it clung to her like a second skin. The only modest aspects of the cloth was the high collar obscuring her neck and what looked like a gray obi, with a metal slate sewn in, tied around her waist.

And from the way she held herself, she was obviously from an important clan. Why on Earth would she embarrass her family like that?

The other one nearly made him cry out in horror. It was a-a-

IKASIMIXIUSUUKUZIHSXURAHIMAN ANXEOMOT

"NIKUSHI!"

The girls nearly fell over at the exclamation. Tsuki stared at the bizarre boy in confusion whilst Rei turned towards her in askance, only to freeze.

"Pfft!"

The purple-haired teen jerked her head back to look at the source of the sound, only to stare at her best friend who was trying to hold back her laughter.

She tilted her head in question, but paused at the shifting weight on her head. Her surprised expression seemed to be the final straw, because the next thing she knew, the other girl held her stomach as she cried tears of laughter.

Her source of amusement was the other girl's attire, which was basically an orange jumpsuit with a hood. Shaped like a frog's head. Which had fallen into place over her violet hair.

Hence... everything.

"Oh my God! You should see your FACE!" she managed in between breaths, pointing a finger at the other teen as she tried to reign in her giggles.

The blue-eyed teen's only response was to yank up a handful of dirt and childishly throw it right into the other's open mouth. As the younger girl sputtered, she turned back towards the frightened, and now confused, boy and tried to put on her most patient smile.

At the sight of the blood draining from his face, she figured she failed. Oh well. She pressed on. "Um, dude? I'm not _actually_ a frog..." she tried.

The silver-haired teen seemed to be taken aback, and he immediately went into correcting her. As respectfully as possible. "Ah! I would never mistake Nikushi-san for a common frog, milady!"

"I'm not-!"

"Of course, I will not tell others of your existence in these woods, you have my word! And I meant no disrespect in offering my services, though I can only imagine that one such as yoursel-"

"I'M NOT A FROG SPIRIT, DAMMIT!" she yelled. At the silence that met her, she took a deep, calming breath and tried to explain once more. "I'm just a regular person. You see this thing on my head?" she gestured to the orange hood resting on her crown. "It's just a part of my jacket. It accidentally fell on my head when this bastard," here she gestured to Rei, "decided to use my head for anger management therapy."

Her only response was a sour "I don't know why you even wear that ugly thing."

"Shut up, it was a gift," she snapped. "And it's twice as cool as _Hiruzen-sempai_ will ever be."

There was a strangled snarl of outrage, but she ignored it in favor of pulling down her hood to reveal her short, violet hair and prove to the stranger that she was human. She had a moment to appreciate the look of relief in his eyes before a fist made contact with her skull and sent her tumbling into the ground once more.

Rei sniffed at her rude best friend's position before standing up and dusting herself off. After discerning that she'd managed to get most of the dirt off her, she turned her attention onto the boy that seemed frozen.

"Hey, what's wrong? It's not like I bite," she cooed, using the patented Comforting Nurse smile her mother had worked in her favor for years.

Tsuki pushed herself back up into a sitting position once more and snorted. "Yeah, right. And saying that while giving your Rape Face is so believable."

The dark-eyed girl whirled to glare at the other, missing the increasing pallor of their acquaintance. She opened her mouth to yell, only to snap it shut and pinch the bridge of her nose, trying to take deep breaths.

"Anyways..." she turned her attention back to the boy–whom now looked very tempted to just up and run. "Did you really think that she was a youkai? Not that that's a big leap, but you actually acted concerned. Are you a scaredy-cat or something?"

He scowled, clearly insulted by her mockery, and was about to retort when something occurred to him, making him look at her disapprovingly. "One should not dismiss the spirits so easily. Especially a young lady of high standing like yourself, despite your 'profession,'" he finished with a tone that stated very clearly what he thought her "profession" was.

Within tenths of a second, Tsuki was rolling around on the ground as she dissolved into laughter. Meanwhile, Rei looked caught between beating her friend within an inch of her life and just outright killing the insolent boy in front of her.

TSUKIWANTSTODOITWITHRENDIEME LONHEYBUTYOUDIDN'TERASEITBECAUSEITGOESWITHOU SAYINGTHATIT'SALIE

The indecent woman's rage may have cowed him were he still a boy, but as it was, only a small piece of him was frightened, and that was easily hidden.

He was largely unimpressed (and still a little unnerved) by the other woman's reaction. For if she was a woman, and they both seemed sincere about that, there really was no excuse to act so unruly. And who on Earth wore a theatre costume (for that was the only explanation for such an outrageous outfit) out in the middle of nowhere?

"...I think I should get going."

He wondered, as he slowly turned around and began to walk away, if they remembered his debt to them freeing him. A sincere prayer was sent in the hope that they didn't.

A dainty hand gripped his bicep. Like a vice. "And just where do you think you _are_ going, Mr. 'I am forever in your debt'?"

Well, apparently he'd fallen out of favor with the gods once more.

He risked a quick glance and, of course, it was the obscene young miss that was trying take his arm off.

Nervously, he chuckled, slightly afraid to maintain eye contact with the girl. Who knew such a small human could have such brutal strength?

"I-It seems I have mistaken my rescuer," he gulped. "You see, I just remembered, I was rescued only weeks ago! A-And although this has been a lovely...experience, I really must pay my regards–"

The obscene young lady gave him an unbelieving stare. She tightened her grip, and he swore he could almost feel his veins being constricted from underneath his skin. "You know, I can tell when someone is lying."

The frightened man only glanced at her for a second before retreating his line of vision to the debris of the crumbled tomb. "Why would I lie? I have absolutely no reason to lie!" he exclaimed. It was ridiculous how distressed he sounded, almost as if he were pathetically trying to convince himself. He continued, his voice fainting with every syllable. "Absolutely no reason to lie, other than the fact that I'm quite possibly fearing for my life at this very moment..."

She continued to glare. "What was that?"

Thankfully for him, the other-less violent-girl quickly interrupted. "Hey, princess, you're scaring him."

Oh, she was his true savior. The holy frog spirit.

The obscene wench–lady took in his nervous figure. With a conclusion, she smirked with satisfaction and released her grip. "Good."

He wanted to shudder at her sadistic grin.

His "savior" tilted her head in curiosity. "So, who are you exactly?"

He blinked. "Ah... You didn't know who I was when you freed me?" That was...unexpected.

"Noooo..." she said slowly. He had the vague impression he should feel insulted. "Why would I?"

To feel insulted or to be impressed, that was the question. "Well, I had expected there to be some indication that I was inside. It's quite the accomplishment to create something that could contain one such as myself," he clarified, unintentionally puffing up his chest in pride.

The scary lady gave him an unimpressed look. "Yes, I imagine it takes a lot to scare you."

He tried to not twitch at that.

The spirit masquerading as a woman looked preoccupied as she considered something, so he was left to deal with the insult on his own. "I am not easily frightened, nor is that what I said," he replied testily.

"You seem pretty edgy around me and Tsuki."

He snapped, "Anyone would be put off when confronted with a violent harlot!"

Dark eyes flared in outrage, but he cut her off with a wave of his hand, trying to reign in his temper. "If you had paid attention, _young miss_," here he resisted a snort, though he couldn't keep the derision out of his voice, "You would understand that I had not called myself fearless–even though I _don't_ fear you–but rather had admitted to being a warrior of considerable skill."

He bristled at her doubtful look, but before either of them could start again, they were interrupted.

URANAAGURANARUKUKASEELAMETAK IHS

"Ah!" the purple-haired girl exclaimed, bopping her fist into her open palm. "The shrine had 'Rikudo' engraved into it!" She folded her arms and nodded her head, pleased with having remembered it.

At the resounding silence that greeted her, she looked up to see the two looking at her with similar looks of 'Are you freaking kidding me?' on their faces.

"What?"

Rei just sighed in exasperation whilst the silver-haired boy looked caught between concern and disbelief. Tsuki dismissed it with a wave of obliviousness. She nodded at Rikudo. "Hey, is that your name, stone boy?"

At his taken aback expression, she clarified, "Rikudo. That's your name, isn't it?"

He gave a small nod, only to glare at Rei, whom snorted incredulously. "O-kay. Zealous parents, don't you think?"

He flushed lightly. "Ah, actually, I chose it for myself."

Rei whistles, "I stand corrected. Ambitious much?"

"I aspire to be known throughout the world for my strength, so I chose a title worthy of such," he stated with pride.

The girls couldn't help but smile slightly at each other, reminded somewhat of their fathers. Rei snapped out of it to return her attention to 'Rikudo.'

"Sounds like you live in a rough area. Where are you from?" she questioned, forcing herself to sound nonchalant even as she studied him closely for any signs of deception.

"I hail from Uzushiogakure," he answered honestly, perhaps even fondly. He clutched at the necklace around his neck as he spoke on. "I carry the symbol of my home with great pride."

Tsuki studied the spirals etched into the charms in his necklace while Rei narrowed her eyes. "I see. I can't say I'm familiar with it."

"Well, duh, you never even go fifteen miles out of the village for anything unless there's a job," said Tsuki, as if it were the most obvious fact in the world. Rei suppressed the urge to roll her eyes.

Tsuki couldn't understand why her best friend was being so stingy. The guy answered all the questions they threw at him, and there was no way such a confused dude could do anything remotely bad. Plus, he seemed kinda cool, what with all the unique symbols and such.

Rei, on the other hand, was not amused. Her eyes sharpened at his words. He was in foreign land and clearly not with the times, based on his language and attire. His whole character could only be described as fishy. Rei made a mental note to completely ignore any oncoming questions this stranger might ask–

"And where am I exactly?"

"This is the Land of Fire's one and only Konohagakure!" Tsuki shouted with pride.

Rei's jaw dropped. The words "YOU STUPID IDIOT" were caught at the back of her throat as she raised her fist to beat the living daylight out of her clearly dimwitted friend.

"The Land of Fire?" the boy questioned. He sucked in his breath and suddenly stepped back and assumed a cautious stance, shifting his eyes about in unease. "The battle-what's our position? How many are we against? Is there some sort of barrier?"

"Barrier? What are you talking about? There hasn't been any major action since Rokudaime signed that treat–ACK!" Tsuki's eyes were planted on the fist hovering above her. She tried to take a step back before losing her balance and falling on the dirt ground. She heaved herself back up and took in a gulp of air to angrily shout, "What the _hell_, Rei?"

Rei snapped out of her position and retracted her arm. She mumbled an apology, ignoring the startled girl trying to catch her breath. She nodded at Rikudo. "You said something about a battle? What's the last thing you remember?"

He narrowed his eyes. "Why do you ask? Isn't it obvious?"

"No, actually, it isn't. We haven't had any serious battles here in years," the dark-eyed girl stated matter-of-factly. "And answer my question."

He opened his mouth to no doubt give a quick retort, only to pause. A few moments passed, Rikudo's breath quickened as he clutched at his head in panic. "I... I don't..." he rasped. "I don't remember. Not really. It's all vague, like after drinking the entire bar under the table."

The girls shared a look of surprise mixed with–in some cases, unwilling–concern. They gazed at each other, silently communicating as they wondered whether the strange boy was being honest. After a moment, Rei nodded wordlessly at her best friend before turning back to Rikudo.

"That's... a little disconcerting, I have to admit," she said somewhat reluctantly. Did that shrine have something to do with it?

Apparently, she and the other girl were on the same page because just as she thought that, Tsuki asked, "Do you at least have some idea how you ended up inside that shrine?"

Pale gray eyes peered at them almost helplessly as he shook his head. A second later, the rest of her words seemed to register. "Wait, that prison was a shrine?" he asked incredulously.

Rei raised her eyebrows. "Well, yeah. I think so, at least. I only got a glimpse of it before..." here, she grimaced.

"Before she destroyed the whole damn thing," Tsuki finished flatly. She turned to glower at her so-called best friend before detailing what she had seen of the monument. "The shrine was made of some weird type of stone, not like the small ones you usually see. And what was even weirder was the build. There was no opening whatsoever, though now I guess we know why. Other than that, all there was was that engraving of your name and..." She pondered for a moment before snapping her fingers, "And there was an indentation in the altar above it! It looked like some kind of amulet was there..." she trailed off.

The dark-haired girl ignored the other's mutterings in favor of the boy. "Got any clues from that?" At the sullen shake of his head, she sighed. "Well, looks like you're coming with us to see Rokudaime-sama."

Rikudo adopted an aloof expression. "And why would I do that? I don't even know who this Rokudaime is."

"He's the head of our village, and the second strongest-"

"THE strongest-"

"Shaddup. The _second_ strongest man in the country," she finished.

The look aimed at her was distinctly unimpressed. "Doubtful as I am of your claim, I still see no reason to go to him. And why on Earth should I trust you in the first place?"

She crossed her arms. "Well, considering the fact that you don't know where the heck you are and we-" She pointed between Tsuki and herself. "Saved you, you really have no choice _but_ to trust us. Plus, we could always report you as a suspected terrorist trespassing our borders."

His eyes narrowed, insulted at the obvious threat. "I did not come here willingly, I'll remind you," he sneered. "Aside from that, I don't even know your names, despite having given you mine. Such a discourtesy does not make for a good foundation of trust."

At this, Tsuki blinked. "Seriously? Wow, how'd we forget about that?" she questioned herself for a minute before shrugging and starting the introductions, ignoring the frantic looks from the other girl.

"Well, anger issues here is Uchiha Rei, youngest member of the Uchiha clan and Gorilla Fist extraordinaire," she jerked a thumb at the dark-eyed girl scowling at her. After his nod to convey his understanding, she patted her own chest to gesture towards herself. "And I'm Namikaze Tsuki, heir to one clan, member of none."

She trotted over to Rikudo and held out her hand. "We're the best people you'll ever meet!" she claimed with a cheerful grin on her face.

SHERLOCKHOLMESISSTRAIGHTFORJ OANWATSONANDTHEYBEHAVINGSOME HOTBRITISHCHINESEBABIES

He stared the frog youkai as she continued to hold out her hand for some obscure reason. What was he supposed to do? She didn't want him to give an offering, did she?

Silence continued for a few minutes. He did his best to ignore the muffled sounds of chuckles coming from Uchiha's direction as he tried to look for any sign as to what he was supposed to do.

Nikushi-sa–oh wait, _Namikaze_-sama's smile fell as she looked up at him quizzically. "Ya know, most people would've shaken it by now..." she hinted.

He started. Oh! The silver-haired man reached out with two fingers and gingerly shook the spirit's thumb, tuning out the now clear guffaws a few yards away.

"Now come on," she said, abruptly grabbing his wrist, much to his surprise. "Let's go see the Rokudaime."

He quickly pressed his heel hard into the ground to brace himself. "Wait, I thought I made it perfectly clear I would not be meeting this Rokudaime."

The harlot raised a brow and looked at him pointedly. "Do you have a place to stay? Because last I checked-" She pointed at the direction of the destroyed tomb. "You don't have one anymore."

He quickly snapped. "And whose fault is that exactly?"

"I dunno," she replied, narrowing her eyes. "Why don't you ask the people who put you there in the first place?"

Rikudo clicked his tongue and could only think, _What a snarky brat._

"Alright!" Namikaze-sama cheered, ignoring the two glaring figures in front of her. "Then all the more reason to see the Rokudaime!"

"But-" he tried, resisting the pull of his unwanted guide.

The Uchiha brat rolled her eyes. "Do you want me to pay you back or not? Besides, it's not like you can actually make an argument, what with your current homeless status."

"I..." He sighed. "I... can find nothing to say to your statement."

"Then let's hurry up and go. We're wasting valuable training time." Uchiha started to walk off in a direction he assumed led to their village. Namikaze-sama quickly tugged his wrist, silently telling him to follow.

"And afterwards, we can go for ramen!"

"What is that?"

He grew concerned at the look she threw him, as if she were about to hyperventilate, while the harlot just stared at him in surprise.

"You're kidding me, right?" They both grew silent for a few seconds. He was unsure whether he had said something wrong or...

Tsuki shook her head, looking exhausted. "You've got a lot to learn."

RINANDKOHAKUAREGOINGTOMARRYA NDMAKEBABIES

Naruto could only look on with heartbreak as he watched the many civilians of Konoha sitting with bowls and bowls of ramen. Thoughts of his younger days tingled his senses nostalgically as he remembered his daily routine of sitting down at Ichiraku and having his special ramen-using his trusty cut-out coupons, of course. The smell rising from it and the feel of the chopstick lifting the noodles to his mouth-

"Naruto, you have guests," called Sai, sounding vaguely disturbed.

He quickly wiped away the drool, disappointed it ended before he got a taste. As he turned to see his secretary, his vision was blocked by a mountain of paperwork that was larger than the number of paper bills Tsunade-baa-chan owed. He got out of his chair and looked over the mound of detestable duties.

"Tell them I'm busy," he sighed. It wasn't a lie, but that didn't mean he was going to do it anytime soon...

"I don't think that will work," said the pale artist.

"And why on Earth not?" cried the Rokudaime, letting out his frustration.

"It's your daughter, and I think she knows better by this point," he answered with a slightly amused smile.

"Well, why the formality? It's my daughter; just let her in," he motioned with a wave of his hand around the pile of torture.

"She has brought a guest," he replied waiting for a reaction before complying with his last motion.

"Yeah, I know, it's Rei," the blonde dismissed without looking up. "Dude, she's practically family. It's fine."

"No–well, yes, her too–I mean she has another guest."

He froze before looking up, panicked. "Wait, did they break something again? Do I have to get my checkbook out?!"

"This one doesn't seem as angry as the other ones did."

"Then... is it a guy? It's a guy, isn't it? She got herself a boyfriend, didn't she? Oh, this fated day has arrived!"

"No, it's-"

"IT'S THAT NEKOZAWA KID, ISN'T IT?"

"No, it's not Nekozawa-san-"

"I SHOULDA SEEN THIS COMING–hah?" Naruto blinked and fell back into his seat, feeling almost putout. "...It's not the Nekozawa kid?"

Sai let out a sigh, "No."

"...Then who is it?"

"That's the strange part. I don't know who he is. No one in the _building_ knows."

CHRISPINEISSOFINE

Rikudo felt awfully uncomfortable as he stood awkwardly. The man he presumed to be the Rokudaime had his hands folded together, looking intensely at him.

His wide blue eyes were shrewd, studying him intently from a childish face–made no better by the whisker-like birthmarks–set in a ridiculous scowl. Messy blonde hair fell into his eyes, forcing him to break the serious look with a frustrated attempt at pulling the bangs back.

A quick scan of his attire just made his impression of the man all the more conflicting. A black... top of some sort with a red flame design was set off by an orange pair of strange hakama and red geta. And over the strange piece of furniture hidden by the stacks of paper, he spotted an ostentatious red cloak with black flames.

The man looked like an overgrown child, but there was power in him; he could sense it.

He glanced at Namikaze-sama and Uchiha, whom both seemed amused at his current predicament.

"Well." Rikudo jumped and quickly turned to the man before him. The blonde man leaned back into his chair. "I certainly don't remember seeing you in the village. And no one else seems to either."

"With good reason... sir," said Rikudo.

"Oh really? Because I've heard every excuse in the book, believe me. I made all of them."

Uchiha snorted.

"I apologize; however, I do not feel comfortable telling you anything about me when I myself am not familiar with you," Rikudo said warily.

"To be honest, it's not exactly my cup of ramen having a complete, potentially dangerous, stranger in my village."

Although he should probably have felt insulted, Rikudo couldn't help but admire the man's honesty.

"But," he continued, his blue eyes softening just a little. "Since you are in my village, I have an obligatory duty to take care of you. And to do that, I need your cooperation."

DOINGALINEBREAKBECAUSEASHBOS SSAMASAIDSO

Naruto took in Rikudo as the boy considered his options. What he saw was a young, ridiculously tall, man barely out of his teens, with a strong body born of hard work. The outdated clothes–a dreary gray gi under a black, long sleeved shitagi and a pair of black hakama all held together with a thin red obi–and quality rosary did nothing to take away from the proud set of his shoulders.

The sloppily-cut, silver hair complimented a handsome face with a strong jaw, one that surely caught many girls' attention. But the pale gray eyes revealed what all his posturing and pride attempted to conceal: a mixture of caution, anxiety, and (to his surprise) hope.

Taking the initiative, he stood up and walked to the other side of the room, Tsuki and Rei watching curiously. He closed the door before turning to Rikudo. "For extra reassurance, whatever you say in this room stays in this room. I give you my word as Rokudaime, the Sixth Hokage of Konohagakure Village."

Tsuki's eyes brightened in admiration. She nudged her best friend and squealed quietly, "He's so cool!"

Naruto glanced at his feet, attempting to allow his guest any privacy he needed to make his decision. The room grew silent. He wondered whether he was going to get an answer-

"My name is Rikudo."

Naruto's eyes snapped up.

"...I've been trapped in a tomb–a shrine. The last thing I remember is leaving my village, Uzushiogakure, in the Land of Whirlpools."

Naruto felt a chill race up his spine and his hackles rose at the information. He tried his best to hide his shock and rising suspicion.

"And?" he pushed.

Rikudo shrugged. "And that's it. I can't remember anything else leading up to it. Everytime I attempt to recall my memories, I can only see vague images, but nothing clear enough to make sense."

Naruto nodded, satisfied. "Well, don't push it. Try and relax. Maybe it'll come to you later."

"So, he can stay?" asked Tsuki, hopeful.

"As long as the three of you don't say anything about the matter to anyone else-"

Tsuki cheered, "ALRIGHT!"

Naruto winced. "I'm serious! This is a matter that is to be considered top secret. The only reason why I'm letting you two into this mess is because I feel Rikudo will be more comfortable."

He ignored his daughter's ongoing enthusiasm and continued tiredly, "I'm just happy you didn't break anything this time."

The girls were about to retort before the image of Rei slamming Tsuki down onto the monument appeared. The Uchiha laughed nervously. "Well, to say we didn't break anything..."

"_We_?" Tsuki enunciated. "_You're_ the one who destroyed the freaking shrine!"

"Okay, can we get over that?" barked Rei.

Naruto shook his head. "Apparently, I spoke too soon." He smiled weakly at the silver-haired boy. "I apologize for these two's... treatment to your home. Could you please step outside for a minute?" He aimed a harsh glare at the two girls. "I'd like to have a word with them. Alone."

Rikudo nodded politely. Once he left the room, Naruto immediately fell into his seat. "_What _were you two thinking?"

"Dad-" Tsuki began.

"No, let me finish," he cut her off. "Not only did you make a huge mess–once again–you brought a complete stranger to the village!"

"That was one time!" Rei countered.

"And Dad, you said it was alright for Rikudo to stay!" finished Tsuki.

"If it were anyone else but Rikudo, I'd give you more than just a scolding." Naruto sighed. "But if I hear one word from anyone about this matter, Rikudo will be imprisoned and treated as potential threat, and you two will be on probation."

"Don't worry, Dad, we got this!" his daughter gleefully assured him.

"Treat this as a mission. No one is to know where Rikudo came from. If they ask, say he's a traveler from Sand. I'll talk to Gaara about it."

"Yes, sir," said Rei. "Is there anything else you would like us to do?"

"Yeah, change his name. And make sure he wears something... not so suspicious."

MYMOMREFERSTOJUNGYONGHWAASMY HUSBAND

Rei let out a deep exhale of relief as they walked out the building, Rikudo in tow. "I thought for sure we'd get in trouble again."

"Dude, that's pretty awesome, though," Tsuki replied in wonder. She turned to Rei, grinning, "It's like a top secret mission! S class!"

Rei rolled her eyes. "Yeah, "top secret" meaning you better keep your big trap _shut_."

"Yeah, yeah," Tsuki dismissed absentmindedly. "That was so intense, I'm craving some ramen now!"

"But first, we have to get _him_," Rei stuck a finger in Rikudo's direction, "Some clothes."

Rikudo, who had been staring intently at a tree a few roofs away, blinked and pointed at himself innocently. "Does this mean I am allowed to stay?"

The grinning violet-head winked and threw him a peace sign. "That's what Dad said. But for now, if anyone asks, you gotta say you're from the Land of Sand."

He tripped over his own feet as he quickly jerked around to stare at Tsuki. "Wait, your dad? As in your father?"

"Oh, did I leave that part out?" she chuckled sheepishly.

"And don't say your name is Rikudo," Rei interrupted, murmuring his name.

"Then, what should my name be?" he asked, confused.

Tsuki and Rei glanced at each other and nodded in silent agreement. They looked back at him and said in unison, "Riku!"

OPPANGANGNAMSTYLEDOODOODOO

The blonde watched from his window as the girls dragged Konoha's newest resident into the heart of the village. Once they disappeared, he shouted at Sai to not let anyone else into his office and then settled himself on the floor behind his desk.

Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath and fell into himself. When he opened his eyes again, he was looking into the scarlet gaze of his "roommate." He tried to grin cheerfully at the fox, but the flat look he received spoke loud enough to wipe it right off his face.

He sighed. "What am I going to do?"

The derisive snort made him shoot a sharp glare at the other. After a few moments passed, it was the youkai's turn to sigh. "Can't help you there. This is a sticky situation, and one wrong move could have it blow up in our faces."

"You really think he's..." Naruto trailed off, unable to voice his suspicions.

There was a pause as the other looked at him before answering almost defeatedly, "Yeah. I'm almost damn sure it's the old man."

The blonde peered at him in confusion. "'Almost'?"

A frustrated sigh escaped the fox's mouth and he scratched the back of his head in irritation. "He's not the same as I remember. He's not just young, he's... weak," he finished, saying the last word like a curse.

"Doesn't that make sense, though?" Naruto questioned. "I mean, from the looks of it, he came from just when he was starting to get involved in the battles."

Kurama shook his head. "Not weak like low on power, but..." he growled as he tried to describe the curious sensation his pseudo-father had given off. "It's like he's... missing something," he tried.

The jinchuuriki frowned at the cryptic description and pondered on that. "Maybe the way he got to this time left some part of him behind? Like astral projection?" he offered, though even as he said it, he knew they weren't exactly right.

The youkai seemed to share the same doubt, although he hummed a "maybe" in response.

Naruto decided to push the matter aside for later thought. "Well, regardless," he started, catching his friend's attention, "We've got to be careful here. He may not yet be the legend from the stories, but that won't matter to others if they find out about him."

The fox nodded his head in solemn agreement, "It'll be like sharks scenting blood." A thought seemed to occur to him. "This could put the whole village in a bad situation, and it'll go especially bad for you if they find out about the old man and realize you've been hiding him," he warned. "Are you sure you want to risk that?"

"Kurama," the blonde said softly, a determined glint in his eyes, "I'm not going to sell out a kid to save my own skin. I'll protect him just as I would anyone else."

Crimson eyes widened before closing as a pleased smile graced his features. "I don't doubt it."

The other nodded and made to leave before faltering, looking back at the youkai. Horrified realization was etched in his face.

"What is it?" the red fox asked worriedly.

"He doesn't know..." Naruto whispered hoarsely. "He doesn't know that he's in a different time, that everything he knows is _gone_. What the hell am I going to tell him?" he continued, dread filling his gut.

Kurama gazed at him, uneasy expression mirroring his.

"Nothing," he finally responded, tone grave. "Absolutely nothing."

The jinchuuriki snapped out of his meditative state with a sharp gasp, feeling sick for several moments. Once he'd finally calmed down, he sent a toad summons to retrieve Kakashi.

Even though Kakashi hadn't been late for a summons in years, he still felt a small shock at his old teacher's punctuality.

"Yo," the silver-haired man greeted, not looking up from his book. "What'd you need, Naruto?"

Blue eyes narrowed at his superior-turned-subordinate as he tried to keep the tension out of his voice, "Tsuki and Rei picked up a stray while messing around. Can you keep an eye on them for a while?

Dark, almost jet-black, eyes peered over the cover to study him. After a short examination, the book was put away in favor of questions. "Is there anything I should know?"

Naruto couldn't help but chuckle at that. "More than you could imagine, but not what you're thinking right now. I just want to make sure nobody causes problems for now–and maybe get your impression on our guest."

Skeptical eyes still watching him, Kakashi nodded. "Will do."

In a swirl of leaves, he was gone, leaving the blonde to his thoughts.

PARTWHEREOTHERPARTBEGINS

Rikudo had never seen so many people flocked together at once. The "heart of the village" was truly a magnificent sight to see. The civilians discussed their day happily with each other, and the children ran about with no fear of the outside world. Rikudo was enthralled by the innocence of Konohagakure. Why had he not heard of this village before?

"Alright!" He flinched at the sudden outburst from Namikaze-sama. "Clothes, clothes, clothes~ Where to get some clothes~?"

He watched Uchiha roll her eyes in annoyance as the spirited... spirit started to skip around. "Would you calm down?"

Namikaze-sama pouted. "You're no fun, you stick in the mud."

"Tch, whatever," the black-haired harlot responded. She turned to Rikudo. "Let's just get this over with. I have a training session with Shikamaru-sensei in a few hours."

"May I ask why I need new clothes? What is wrong with the clothes I have on?" Rikudo asked.

Namikaze-sama answered bluntly, "Bro, you obviously don't realize how much you stand out. You're like an old person that just went through the best plastic surgery money can buy."

Rikudo's face scrunched up, trying to decipher the meaning of what "plastic surgery" was.

Uchiha paused and leaned into a pile of male clothes set out in front of a clothing store. She fingered the cloth and pressed it against her fingers. Perhaps she was feeling the fabric. "Hey, Riku? Try this on for a sec."

Rikudo watched as she picked up a simple, neutral-colored shirt. She peered over the rest of the products on the table before grabbing a pair of black hakama like the ones Rokudaime-san wore. She held the items out to Rikudo and motioned for the owner, a skinny middle-aged woman.

She came over with a big smile on her face... which proceeded to falter when she realized who her guests were.

Namikaze-sama rolled her eyes. "Relax, old lady, we didn't break anything. We're here to buy something."

Uchiha turned around and gave him a small smile. "She'll help you find a room to try them in."

"And come out when you're done so we can see it!" The violet-haired spirit-woman-creature piped in.

HEYYYYYYYSEXYLADY

"Does it feel weird to you?" Tsuki asked, shifting uncomfortably.

Rei looked at her, baffled. "What do you mean?"

Tsuki sneaked a glance at her surroundings before taking a step closer to Rei, despite the other girl's protests of personal space. "Girls waiting on a guy to come out of a dressing room, instead of the other way around," she explained flatly.

Rei was about to retort before Rikudo stepped out of the store, looking younger and less fierce than when he entered. She studied his attire, feeling that something was off, but offered an assuring smile all the same.

Despite this, Rikudo looked more uncomfortable than when he first awoke from the tomb. He scratched his neck. "Is this supposed to tighten against my neck?"

Tsuki took one glance before barking out a laugh. "Um, I think you grabbed something else hanging in there, dude. That's for a woman."

The boy seemed to take this in for a moment, expression blank, before clapping his hands together as he took in a breath. The next thing they knew, the turtleneck literally exploded, leaving only tattered remains at his feet.

A short silence followed as everyone absorbed what just happened.

Every person in the room stared at him. Oddly enough, the store was filled with mixed emotions. Most everyone stared out of fright seeing the tattered shirt on the floor and the many intricate tattoos covering the boy's torso, but the others were filled with flushed faces, loud heart beats, and facial expressions screaming 'WOW HE'S HOT!'.

"Bad, Riku! Bad!" Rei finally scolded him, though everyone could feel the amusement rolling off her. She pulled a few coins out of her pocket and handed them to the store owner as compensation. "Sorry about that."

"Aw crap," Tsuki suddenly muttered.

The other girl scoffed, "She'll get over it. Besides, you've done far worse."

"No, it's not that." she responded, shaking her head. She pointed at the obvious group of civilians staring and pointing at the newcomer beside them.

Her best friend cursed softly. "Come on, let's get out of here," Rei said under her breath, glaring at the group of watchful eyes before taking off in the opposite direction. "Before they get any ideas."

The silver-haired boy quickly bowed politely to the store owner, shot a quick look at one of the nearby roofs, and ran after his saviors.

Tsuki quickened her steps to match Rei's, tugging Rikudo to their side. She tilted her head in his direction. "Would it be bad for civilians to know about him?"

"It's not the civilians I'm worried about, it's the shinobi. The Elders in particular," the raven groaned. "You know they'd have a problem with him just because an_ Uchiha_ brought him in, let alone that he's a foreigner unregistered with any of our allies."

The blue-eyed teen growled at the reminder, angered on both her best friend and her new friend's behalf. A cleared throat drew the two girls attention back to Rikudo.

He had cautious yet curious glint in his eyes. "What does your family have to do with my trustworthiness?"

The Uchiha blinked at him while her friend started to smile. _This could be a very good thing!_

"Well, ya see, it's kind of an old thing between Konoha and Rei's ancestors," Tsuki started to explain. "The Uchiha clan was one of the founders, but their clan head wasn't chosen to be the village leader. It kinda led to some bad blood, since he resented the people for it."

She went on to describe the rivalry between Madara Uchiha and the Shodaime, which ended bloody and resulted in everyone regarding the Uchiha clan with suspicion. After the attack of the Nine-Tailed Fox (here Riku seemed to have a faint idea of what she was talking about, but said nothing), the suspicion quickly turned to fear and anger.

Rei took over for her at that point. "After years of that treatment, my clan had enough and plotted a coup d'etat. My... my uncle put a stop to it, but it left my father as the only heir," she continued softly, watching the ground as they walked through the less crowded streets. "My father had a hard time from it and made some mistakes, and..." She trailed off.

Luckily, Riku seemed to be able to grasp the end by himself. "And now, despite your status, there is much mistrust between the people and your clan," he assumed.

"Eh, the people in general don't really mind them these days," Tsuki corrected with a shrug. "It's just the Elders that seem to be holding the grudge. Well, them and the princess's dad." She jerked a thumb over at her unusually somber friend, whom snapped out of her mood to glower at the girl.

She frustratedly begged, "Can we just get off this topic?"

Riku visibly struggled to find a way to change the subject, only to be taken by surprise as someone latched onto his wrist and literally dragged him behind her at a breakneck speed.

"ICHIRAKU, HERE I COME!"

At his completely stunned and helpless look, Rei–whom was also being dragged behind the exuberant girl–couldn't help but laugh.

MELONGETYOURASSOVERHEREANDTY PE

Rikudo stretched his arm to loosen the tension from Namikaze-sama's... enthusiasm. According to Uchiha-brat-san, Namikaze-sama only supplies this much energy when it involves food or "ass-kicking missions."

"ONE ORDER OF PORK RAMEN, OLD MAN!" Namikaze-sama yelled, as she burst through the curtains of what Rikudo assumed to be Ichiraku. Uchiha-brat-san rolled her eyes before she gently (at least compared to Namikaze-sama) raised the curtains. Rikudo followed suit and was surprised to find an alluring scent rolling from behind the worn down looking bar.

The old man in a white, folded paper hat grinned, his wrinkled face still showing a lively spark. "Only one order, Tsuki-chan? That's a change. Are you cutting down?"

"Yeah right!" said Namikaze-sama. She hopped on one of the stools in front of the old man. "That one's for my new friend here. Get me two orders of miso ramen and one order of spicy pork, please!"

He let out a bellowing laugh and turned to Uchiha-brat-san. "And what would you like, Rei-chan?"

She smiled. "One miso ramen, please."

"Coming right up!" the old man said, before disappearing further into the shop.

Rikudo turned to Namikaze-sama. "What is this "ramen" you speak of?"

She rubbed her hands together. "Poor Riku. Ramen isn't something you can define in words." She took her chopsticks and held them between her hands, blowing into them. "It's a lifestyle."

Although Rikudo still wasn't sure what ramen was, he decided not to further the conversation with Namikaze-sama. The way her eyes glinted, it seemed as though she held the look of a starving bear in search for flesh.

The old man came out carrying a tray of three bowls, followed by a woman who carried two bowls, and set it out in front of Rikudo and Uchiha. The old man put the three bowls in front of Namikaze-sama who did not hesitate to start devouring the first bowl.

Rikudo glanced at Uchiha, who had also split her wooden chopsticks and started to eat. He then mimicked the action and poked through the bowl.

Namikaze-sama (who had just finished her first bowl) burped. "You're not gonna eat that?"

Rikudo stared at the food in front of him for a second longer. "They look like... little baby snakes."

Uchiha grimaced, and quickly shoved the meal away from her.

Namikaze-sama shrugged and continued with her second bowl. The old man stepped out once again, wiping his hands with a rag. He looked at Rikudo, whose attention was focused on the wall near his purple-haired charge. "This the friend?"

The black-haired harlot nodded.

The man surprisingly didn't question anything. He nodded and turned back to Rikudo. "I've never seen you here before. You must be new. How you liking it here?"

"The landmarks are quite idealistic. Never have I thought such landscapes could be filled with vibrant colors. And this feast called a ramen, is it a delicacy?"

The ramen shop owner stared at him for a few minutes before laughing. "He sure is a jokester. No wonder he's friends with you two!"

Rikudo still didn't understand as the man continued to laugh, walking away.

"Rei-chan, Tsuki-chan?"

I'MWRITINGITDANGITANDYOUJUSTDI SAPPEARED

Tsuki turned and tried her best to grin with noodles in her mouth. "FRIFRI-ZHAN! CHIZRU!"

Rei yelped in disgust, "Dude! Chew your food!" Ignoring the glare coming from her friend, she turned towards to two newcomers. "FiFi-chan, Shizu-san, Fancy meeting you two here. Are you guys on a date?"

FiFi grinned, her short pigtails bouncing off her shoulders as she nodded. Shizu, disregarding the small pink tinges on his cheeks, nodded at Rikudo's direction.

"Looks like you're on a date of your own." He raised an eyebrow. "A threesome?"

"Piss off," Tsuki casually retorted before going back to her snack, ignoring Rikudo's horrified expression and the unamused look on Rei's face. "This is Riku. Riku, that's our friend, FiFi, and my bossy teammate, Aburame Shizu."

"Er..."

Luckily, the pig-tailed girl interrupted Rikudo before he could say anything. "Oh, ignore her. She's always like that after someone makes that joke."

Rikudo's eyes clearly spoke of his confusion. "What... is a 'date,' exactly, miss?"

...

Silence enveloped the group as three stared at Rikudo in shock and the fourth grinned in pleasure.

"Finally, someone that won't make that stupid joke all the time!" Tsuki cheered as she slapped the boy on the back encouragingly. "Just for that, I'm paying for your ramen!"

Rei snorted. "That's a first."

"Hey, I've paid for yours too!" she countered. Taking out her coin pouch, she continued, "In fact, I'll pay for your ramen too!"

She flipped her pouch upside down and all around. She awkwardly paused at the sight of the lack of money and laughed nervously. "Uh, how about next time?"

Rei growled and grabbed a handful of money from her pocket, slamming it on the table. "Good-for-nothing best friend," she muttered.

"So Riku-san, was it?" Shizu asked. "I've never seen you around here before."

"Oh, that is because this is my first time here," he answered.

Shizu nodded. "Really. That's interesting. Is there anything you'd like to know about Konoha? It's a great village."

Rei jerked her eyebrows up in agreement before taking a sip of her tea.

"Oh, yes, now that you mention it, what is an 'Icha Icha Paradise'?" RIkudo asked slowly.

The usually composed prodigy spat out her tea in an unfashionable manner. Fi Fi burst out laughing and attempted to pat her choking friend's back.

Tsuki gaped. "Why the hell do you know that name?!"

Rikudo shrugged and pointed to the back of the ramen shop. "That man. He keeps watching us."

Sitting in one of the tables facing them, they clearly saw the familiar orange cover. The owner of the Icha Icha Paradise novel crinkled his eye in what looked to be amusement.

"Kakashi-sensei!" Tsuki yelled.

The silver-haired Jounin chuckled and set down the novel, the mask covering his face formed into the outline of a smirk.

THANKSGIVINGANDI'MTYPING(YOUHAVENOLIFE)

The man Namikaze-sama referred to as "Kakashi" stood up. Rikudo narrowed his eyes at the suspicious man. What was even more suspicious was the black mask linked from the bottom half of his face and the headband that drooped down to cover an eye.

_Just what was he hiding?_ Rikudo couldn't tell. But just as he felt wary of this man, he also knew (by the way Kakashi-san was looking at him) he was being evaluated too.

"Nice seeing you too, Tsuki," Kakashi-san said, patting Namikaze-sama's head. She puffed up her chest and fixed her hair, whining that he was messing it up, but Rikudo could tell she was happy just by being in the presence of the man.

"What are you doing here?" she asked excitedly. "Shouldn't you be sleeping or something?"

Kakashi-san chuckled. "An old man like myself needs to replenish energy too. After all," he slapped Aburame-san's back, "I have to catch up with you kids."

Namikaze-sama grinned and turned back to eating, only to pause at the curious (and suspicious, though he hid it well) look Rikudo was giving.

She perked up at the chance to introduce their newest addition. "This is Hatake Kakashi-sensei. The best shinobi that's ever existed, next to the Rokudaime!"

Kakashi-san gazed at the younger-looking youkai fondly and then turned towards Rikudo, looking slightly amused. "And you're Riku, right?"

He gazed coolly at the man, confirming to himself that this man had been the presence he sensed. "Shouldn't you already know that? You've been following us since we left Rokudaime-san's tower."

Namikaze-sama jerked up. "What?" She scrutinized both Rikudo and Kakashi-san. "You've been following us, sensei?"

He chuckled, flustered. "Now now, you make me sound like a perverted old man when you say it like that. I just wanted to see what the kids are up to nowadays."

Rikudo eyed him doubtfully, though both Namikaze-sama and Uchiha seemed to accept it easily enough.

"You're a rather observant kid," Hatake-san falsely complimented, smiling. "Where did you say you're from?"

Namikaze-sama seemed so energetic, Rikudo decided to let her answer (and he had no inclination to answer himself anyways).

"You won't believe what happened. I was being my innocent self and then suddenly, Rei decides she wants to chase me down through half of freaking Konoha! And then, we arrived at this field-"

Rikudo was only mildly surprised by this point at seeing Uchiha harshly elbow her in the ribs. By the looks of it, Namikaze-sama was in pain as her eyes crossed and her face squinted together. The obvious groans were also a hint.

Uchiha laughed. "She meant to say when she was being a total _idiot_, we bumped into Riku. He's a friend of Sori's and got lost. It's his first time here so we're just showing him around. He might be staying here for a while, though."

Rikudo could tell Hatake-san was having a hard time buying it. It was the look in his crinkled eye. But in a flicker of a second, it was gone and replaced with nonchalant amusement.

"I see," he said. "That's quite an interesting story."

"Heh, tell me about it," Uchiha muttered softly. She seemed relieved.

Namikaze-sama gasped. She wheezed, "Rei, what'd you do _that _for?!"

"It's sad that you even have to ask," she responded.

Rikudo recalled the conversation with Rokudaime-san, concerning his origins and regrettably had to silently thank Uchiha for quieting the youkai woman's explanation. He changed the subject in an effort to ignore that thought, "Do I still need to seek appropriate attire for my stay?"

Fi Fi-san and Aburame-san shared a look at that, seeming confused about something.

The dark-eyed harlot evidently understood the look, because she responded as if to a vocal question. "Oh, Riku only has formal clothes. Apparently, he's never actually had a vacation," she remarked with just the slightest bit of mockery.

He'd have felt insulted if the story weren't part of his cover–and if he actually knew what a "vacation" was. As it was, he just forced a sheepish smile, pretending to be embarrassed by her comment.

Fi Fi-san made an "ah" sound to signify her comprehension and gave him a comforting smile. He wasn't sure whether to be appreciative or annoyed by that.

"Where's your hotel?" she asked–what seemed to him–out of the blue. "I know some shops that give discounts if you're staying at certain places," the brunette went on.

He blinked, unsure of quite what a "hotel" was, though if he had to guess, he'd assume that was what they called an inn around here. He replied unthinkingly, "I'm not staying at any hotels, ma'am."

She frowned at that whilst her companion tilted his head in curiosity and Namikaze-sama's teacher raised an eyebrow. "You mean, you're leaving today?" she asked, looking a little disappointed, which baffled him.

Rikudo shook his head in the negative. "I am staying for a few days, at least," he replied, a small huff of disapproval coloring his tone, though no one but the silver-haired man seemed to notice.

The woman's confused expression didn't relent, but Aburame-san's eyebrows rose in what he assumed was understanding.

The mysterious man on the other side of the bar simply peered over the top of his Icha Icha Paradise book at him. The look in his eye gave him a bad feeling.

With good reason.

"So, who's the new guy sleeping with, then?"

CHAPTER 1 FINISHED!

* * *

**A/N: The line breaks are in all CAPS if you hadn't noticed. We initially had it as a temporary thing but thought it was too funny to delete. So the line breaks don't pertain to the story.**

Ash: Considering only ONE person reviewed last time, I'm gonna have to say so again: please, give us feedback. I know enough of you actually read this.

Dill: Hope you enjoyed! Melon is in charge of the next one. We hope to produce it faster.

Mel: ;_; The pressure is on.

**Check out the AMD profile for more information and a link to the official Sennin Guardian Rikudo blog. **


	3. Chapter 2

Mel: ZUTARA 4 LYFE YO

Ash: ~raises eyebrow but ignores her~ Not a lot is accomplished this chapter, but please be patient.

Dill: I hope we didn't take too long, but it's a really long chapter, so we hope you enjoy! XD

_Disclaimer: We–in no way, shape, or form–own the __Naruto__ franchise. Just the plot, future setting, and new characters._

* * *

Chapter 2

"No."

"But dad-"

"No."

Namikaze-sama sighed as she tried covering her ears from the loud argument occurring on the front porch of the house. The Uchiha compound was certainly not the place to be to take a short nap.

Rikudo watched as the two Uchihas continued to spit spat an argument he presumed to be about his living arrangements, considering the older man was pointing at him every now and then. He stood awkwardly beside a very tall cherry blossom tree that was planted only meters away.

"Are they always like this?" Rikudo asked, wincing at the sudden rise in volume from the older Uchiha.

The young woman shrugged. "More or less. They usually argue about training, if anything."

"Training?" asked Rikudo.

"Yeah, since Rei's a shinobi of the Uchiha clan, she's expected to be talented and capable of standing her own."

Rikudo snapped his head to look at Namikaze-sama in surprise. "Shinobi? She's a shinobi?"

She blinked. "Yeah...? So am I..."

His jaw dropped to the lowest his bone structure would allow. "Y-You're both shinobi?! But you're _women_!"

Namikaze-sama tilted her head, her face morphing into a deadpan expression. "You've gotta be kidding me," she muttered. "Look, Riku, I don't know what kind of village you came from or what their policies were, but this is Konoha, and in Konoha, we welcome shinobi of all kind-"

"No, no, no," interrupted Rikudo, shaking his head rapidly. "I mean no disrespect, it is just... _kunoichi_ are rare in my village."

She raised a brow in interest. Before she could ask anything else, a new guest appeared behind the gate, knocking on the wooden fences repeatedly.

"Yo! Uchiha-hime!"

The new arrival was a young male with red and brown hair spiked to the side, his forehead protected by a strip of cloth with a metal slate bearing the same mark as the one on Uchiha.

His canine gaze glided from his left to his right with twin red markings trailing his cheeks. He raised his arms as he stretched, exposing the odd, tight, crimson gi underneath the thick, sleeveless coat Rikudo had seen on other shinobi here. Relaxing his muscles, he placed his hands in what appeared to be sewn-in satchels in his strange, shortened hakama.

"U-chi-_ha_-HIME!" He shouted, following it up with a loud and unrestrained yawn. "Hurry up..." he mumbled.

His yelling went on ignored as the two continued to argue about the new resident standing outside.

A large, shaggy canine slowly walked up to the tired shinobi and nudged him with its strong muzzle. The man ran his claw-like nails through the monster of a dog's long, solid white mane.

"Just a little bit longer, buddy."

Another–smaller–dog, with curly brown fur, ran up to the two and playfully ran around them, tongue flapping in the wind.

The shinobi let out a sigh as he watched the young canine endlessly circle them. He plopped onto the ground, spreading out his legs, with his sandals loosely looped around his similarly clawed feet. Honestly, Rikudo was just astonished that a person would ever act so easy-going in the presence of others.

A large belch echoed in his eardrums. He turned his head to see his violet, short-haired savior carelessly slumped in the branches, picking her ear and flicking the earwax to the side.

Just what kind of village had he gotten himself stranded in?

"UCHIHA-HIME!" the young male shinobi roared in unison with his two companions' howls.

She turned around to see who called her, but her expression showed no change before she turned back to her father. After saying a few more indeterminable words, she spun on her heels and approached the group, her face sour.

"What do you want, Yasha?" said Uchiha.

He gave a smirk as he stood back up, regaining his composure. "Good seeing you too, hime."

He then turned to Namikaze-sama and nodded in acknowledgement. He paused for a second at Rikudo, a reflection of unfamiliar recognition spiked in his eyes. Pointing, he asked, "Whoa, didn't see you there. Who's your friend?"

She rolled her eyes, flipping her hair over her shoulder. "Riku, Inuzuka Yasha. Yasha, Riku."

Inuzuka-san pressed his lips together, nodding in approval. "Riku, eh? That's a cool name. Is it short for anything?"

Namikaze-sama jerked into the middle of the group, chuckling nervously. "So what'd you come here for anyway, Inuzuka?"

His eyes brightened in realization. He clapped his fist against his palm, a sign of remembrance.

"Oh! That's right, I almost forgot. Sensei's calling us in for a mission."

Rikudo noticed Uchiha's eyes brighten at the mention of a mission. He was still surprised to find out that both she and Namikaze-sama were shinobi, but the flashback of his poor pummeled prison spoke for itself. No normal human could have created such a mess from one punch...

"What's the mission about?" Uchiha asked, excitedly.

Inuzuka-san shrugged, lazily. "I dunno, he just said to find you A.S.A.P. and meet at the Hokage Tower."

"Sweet!" yelled a suddenly awake and perky Namikaze-sama. She jumped up and started walking towards the gate. "Let's go!"

Inuzuka-san was fast enough to grab the frog-hood of her jacket and pulled her back. "Hey, where do you think you're going, Namikaze? It's a private thing. Team Shikawesome only."

Her face fell in disappointment. "B-But I always get to listen in on mission briefings!"

"Not this time. Perks of being the Hokage's daughter only transcend so far."

Before she could start her interruptions, Uchiha quickly walked past her, grabbing Inuzuka-san's arm in the process. "Whatever, let's get out of here." She coolly looked back at Rikudo and Namikaze-sama and ordered sternly, "Take good care of Tsuki, Riku. And Tsuki, don't get Riku into a mess you can't get out of without me."

"Hey!" Namikaze-sama retorted.

As she was walking out, a man with a long ponytail tied over his shoulder started to walk in through the gates. The two bumped shoulders and awkwardly stood, staring at each other. The man looked surprised and so did Uchiha, before her face fell in disturbance. She didn't say anything and, with Inuzuka-san and his dogs, disappeared behind the tall gates into Konoha.

BREAKLINE … SORRY I'M NOT THAT CREATIVE WITH THEM

Uchiha Itachi stared at the only exit of the compound for a few more seconds before he turned back to the guests of his home.

Tsuki grinned cheerfully. "Itachi-sempai!" She proceeded to attack him in a tight hug. He only chuckled and pat her head.

"Tsuki-chan, nice to see you too."

He caught a glimpse of a stoic stare in his peripheral vision. He looked up to see his father glaring at the area where his little sister had left.

"What happened, father?"

Sasuke turned to his son and could almost feel his brewing anger simmer into calmness. Itachi held a very strong physical and comforting resemblance to his deceased brother. He could calm down an entire crowd with a single smile. Shizune, who had delivered him and the rest of their children, had said she'd never seen such a relaxed mother giving birth before as she had Sakura. Although, one could easily assume it was because of Sakura's experience as a medical kunoichi, Shizune insisted the pain of childbirth would still be pain either way.

"Oh, nothing major," he answered sarcastically. "Rei just wants this foreign stranger she just met today, whom she knows nothing about, to stay at our house for a few days. Maybe weeks. Maybe forever."

Itachi turned to the "foreign stranger" who suddenly gave a hesitant smile. Itachi only nodded. "Who are you, may I ask?"

Tsuki immediately jumped, enthusiasm spilling out of her mouth as she replied. "His name's Riku! We...uh, he was lost and Rei-teme and I helped him out. And Sasuke-jii-san, I swear that Riku isn't a threat. He's harmless. We even went to talk with Dad, and he said it'd be fine if he hung out with us for a while! He just needs a place to stay for now. I would let him sleep over at my house, but see, we recently got new weapon shipments and the boxes have taken up the whole guest room."

Itachi stared at Riku as if he were analyzing him. The other man looked very discomforted by the deep onyx eyes that were intent on him. He tried to avoid eye contact but found himself looking back at the man who looked similar to Rei.

"Father," said Itachi. "Why don't we let him stay?"

Sasuke looked like he was about to collapse from the shock. Was everyone going crazy in this family? "Oh, not you too, Itachi," he groaned, pressing his fingers against his temples to battle the massive headache that would soon come.

Itachi shrugged. "I think if Rei trusts him to this extent, there must be some sort of reason behind it. Besides, I'm sure that the Rokudaime would have apprehended him if he thought he was a threat."

"B-But it's _Naruto_!" his father choked out. "He wouldn't know a threat unless it bit him in the ass. And Rei doesn't understand-"

"With all due respect, you've always said that out of the three of your children, Rei was always the most empathetic one. Although, I admit she trusts too easily, I don't think she would let just anyone into her house. I don't see how this situation is any different."

"Actually," interrupted Riku. "She wasn't quite taken with me when we first met. In fact, it was almost as if she held a strong distaste-"

Tsuki quickly clapped her hand against his mouth, halting him from his statement. "What are you doing? _Do you want to live in a cardboard box on the street?_" she whispered, stressing her last sentence.

Sasuke glared half-heartedly. "Itachi, I know your mother and I have raised you to think highly of everyone, but I can't just overlook the fact that... this man-"

"Riku," Tsuki inserted.

"Riku–is a complete stranger."

"Technically, he's not a stranger. You already know his name," Tsuki pointed out.

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "Whatever."

"Then how about we do this," Itachi said, his tone suddenly brightening. "We let Mother have the final decision. Riku stays for now, and if Mother decides she doesn't want him in the house, he has to find someplace else."

His father sighed in defeat. He only muttered a quick agreement before stomping back into the house. Itachi chuckled as he turned back to Riku and Tsuki.

He gave a small smile. "Don't worry, Riku-san. I will talk with my older sister as well. With a little push from all of us, Mother'll probably even force Father to make your bedding."

DIDANYONECATCHTHEPCA?

A knock on the door broke Naruto out of his train of thought. He immediately dropped the pen he was holding and stretched out his fingers, which were sore from the constant use.

"Come in!" he shouted, massaging his dominant hand.

The door opened to reveal a tall man with spiked hair and a lazy stance, and a petite, young girl with long, straight hair. Her pale eyes sparkled with excitement.

The aged Nara Shikamaru stood aside, aloof, while his quieter student took a seat on one of the two chairs in front of the Hokage's desk. He yawned, tired as ever.

Naruto stared at the two and noticed the other two missing members. "Where are Rei-chan and Yasha?"

Loud voices echoed through the walls of his office. He could hear the sound of a frustrated groan coming from Sai outside his door, which burst open to reveal two fighting figures.

"-have the worst temper ever-"

Rei glared. "What's my temper have to do with your fear of women?!"

"_I am not scared of_-"

A loud cough interrupted Yasha before he could continue their argument. They turned their attention to their sensei as he tapped his foot in annoyance at the disrespect they were showing.

"Thank you, Shikamaru," Naruto said. He pulled out the drawer underneath his desk and spread out a map. Pointing to the border of the Land of Fire, he stated, "There have been recent reports of attacks by bandits in Akamori Village, which is directly on the border of the Land of Fire and the Hot Springs Country. Usually, because it is on the border, Konoha wouldn't associate with this matter, but many complaints from Konoha merchants have sparked outrage for those who want to travel to the Hot Springs Country or anywhere further."

Hyuga Kimiko frowned, "Hasn't Akamori been titled an abandoned village? The land is barren, the only sign of life being the trees surrounding the village, and former villagers have long since joined other nations."

Shikamaru spoke up. "It might be an abandoned village on paper, but many people do end up traveling through it. There are cases where merchants will set up shops selling illegal goods or a blackmarket event _because_ it's deemed "abandoned." I wouldn't be surprised if they don't report anything that might happen to innocent travelers to save their own spineless selves."

"A fair assumption," Naruto agreed. "I am dispatching Team Shikamaru to this mission. This will require tracking and hunting down these bandits, as well as the arrest or elimination if necessary. Leave as soon as possible and come back. There are some other issues I need you to cover."

"We're on it, Boss," Yasha sang, giving a two-fingered wave to his Rokudaime before being the first to depart the room.

"Hey-" the older man began.

"Oi, dog breath!" Rei quickly bowed at Naruto and followed Yasha, scolding his rudeness for not even properly saying goodbye.

"Wha-"

"There they go... _again_." Kimiko and Shikamaru followed, both exhausted and slightly ashamed at their embarrassing teammates.

Naruto could only slump into his chair as he pouted. "But I wasn't finished..."

BREAKLINE FOR TSUKI'S PART

"Ugh, this sucks!" shouted the orange-clad girl as she kicked a small rock at Rikudo, whom nonchalantly dodged it.

He looked at her quizzically (and maybe a tad condescendingly). "I understand that you may be used to special treatment, but is it really worth moaning like you're wounded, Namikaze-sama?"

She cut him a flat look, clearly hearing the thinly veiled admonishment. She closed her eyes and turned away as she corrected him, "Get off your high horse, man. It's not like mission briefs are top-secret. Especially ones that us, low-rank shinobi, get."

"Then why are you so discontent with not attending?" he questioned, internally growling at her tone despite his wariness of the possible spirit. "It sounds like a rather boring affair."

The girl whirled around with a twinkle in her eye. "Did you see my dad when we were talking to him in his office? He looked cool, right? Intense, yet good-natured, kinda like a one of those heroes you hear about in stories? He gets like that whenever something remotely serious comes up, and it's so COOL!" she exclaimed, not even pausing for breath. "And that's just one side of him! You've gotta see him when he's training; he uses the awesome techniques that others are too weak to even _think_ about using. And then there's when he's just at home–I like that time best. He just cuts loose and has fun: pranks, cards, messing around in the kitchen, working in the garden, videogames, manga, making fun of Jiraiya's books, exposing closet pervs. It's so much fun!"

He stared at her disconcertedly as she finally stopped, taking a huge gulp of air. "Um... I take it he's an admirable man," he offered. At her enthusiastic nod, he figured it was appropriate to flash her a nice smile, even if it was insincere. "It's... nice that you hold such respect for your father."

Namikaze-sama looked down with a tender expression, nodding quietly.

WESEEMTOSUCKATCONSISTENTPOVS OHERE'SALINE

After a while, Tsuki blinked, realizing something. The violetette looked back up at the gray-eyed boy. "Hey, you aren't acting like you're scared I'm gonna turn you into a toad!" She grinned at him. "Finally realized I'm not a youkai?"

"Not in the slightest," he stated immediately, making her trip on her feet. "I just understand that regardless of your species, you are very young and a bit of a fool."

She didn't know whether to be insulted by his assessment or to applaud his straightforwardness. Eh, she was insulted regularly enough by the others that it wasn't a big deal. "Well, I'll give ya credit for honesty," she complimented, clapping him on the shoulder.

Riku looked down at her in surprise and gave a tentative grin, obviously unused to something she did.

After a few moments, Tsuki grabbed his wrist and started dragging him down the street, getting over her disappointment. "C'mon! We've got time to kill and things to see. Let's move!"

The unusual boy sighed in exasperation and went along with her, easily keeping up.

As they passed by the hospital, a pregnant, pink-haired woman waved at the girl, whom promptly waved back but didn't stop. "That's Sakura, Rei's mom. She works as a medic at the hospital, along with Rei's big sister, Ruka," she explained before adding as an afterthought, "Who're also your tickets to a roof over your head."

A grunt of acknowledgement was all that managed to come out before she was speeding up, having caught sight of one of her goals. Riku's eyes widened as he realized they were heading straight for a crowd of children. "Namikaze-sama, we're going to-"

Tsuki spun around and used the momentum to throw the terrified boy over the gaggle of students. As he was sent flying, she leapt from the ground to the tree and planted both her feet on the trunk to propel herself over the throng. She watched as Riku quickly righted himself midair and landed gracefully in front of the door to the academy.

Her own landing left something to be desired.

SCREECH! CRASH!

"Ow..." she whined as she picked herself up off the ground from where she landed after crashing into the door. She groaned to herself, "I almost made it too..."

"Are you sure you are a shinobi?" he asked her, disbelief clearly in his voice. She leveled him with a glare but didn't answer, just opening the door and walking inside.

They walked down the hall while Riku looked into the open classrooms with curiosity. She gave a squeal of surprise as she found the room she was looking for and ran inside.

A beautiful woman with dark blue, almost black, hair past her hips looked up from the papers on her desk and when her pupiless eyes fell on Tsuki, a gentle smile graced her features.

"Tsuki-chan! To what do I owe the pleasure?" The woman blinked as she saw the boy coming in behind the blue-eyed girl. "And who is this?"

"The reason I'm here, actually," the girl replied. "I'm showing him around the village, since he'll be staying here for a while." Before she could start the introductions, another voice called out to them.

"Oi, Hinata-san. Do you need any help today?" a young man with the same pupiless eyes as Hinata, but that was where the similarities ended. Messy brown hair cut short framed a rugged face set on a pair of broad shoulders and a muscular body. You could hear the water sloshing inside the gourd resting just behind his left hip as he walked in, the usual surly expression on his face not present for once.

Oops. Spoke too soon.

A frown came onto his face as he took in Riku's presence. "Who's the new guy?" he questioned, arms folding as he studied the younger boy. He blinked. "And why the hell is he shirtless? He's not harassing you, is he?" he asked suspiciously.

At Riku's tensed shoulders and subtle shift in position, Tsuki jumped in. "Hey, he's with me, Kyouya-sempai," she assured. And then blinked and turned back to Riku. "...Why the hell haven't you put on another shirt?"

The silverette stared at her in confusion. "I assume you're talking about my state of undress?" At her deadpan expression, he sniffed. "You forced us to leave that tailor without allowing me to retrieve my clothes."

She grimaced at the well-made point and nodded in acceptance before turning back to the pupilless pair. "Ah, _anyways_..." she continued sheepishly. "Meet Riku. He's from Suna, on a... vacation, you might say."

The tentative tone she took caused the older boy's eyes to narrow and the woman's eyebrows to scrunch in curiosity. Riku met their inquisitive expressions with a proud tilt of his head, hiding his own anxiety at what the reason was behind his "vacation," Tsuki was sure.

"Is that right?" Kyouya-sempai asked quietly, almost to himself. "Well, whatever. Name's Kyouya-"

"Hyuuga," the bluenette coughed, causing the young man's mouth to twitch.

"_But call me Kyouya_. Hope I don't have to break your face in during your stay," he finished, expression blank.

Both Tsuki and Hinata chuckled lightly, accustomed to the boy's abrasive attitude as they were, whilst Riku grinned. "I shall do my best, Kyouya-san."

The woman coughed to gain his attention before introducing herself, "And I'm Hinata. It's a pleasure to meet you, Riku-kun."

The silverette smiled at her charmingly and bowed. "The pleasure is mine, Hyuuga-san." At the resounding silence, he looked up to see Tsuki grimacing while Kyouya-sempai had a dark frown and Hinata looked down with a nostalgic smile.

"Ah, sorry, but I'm not a part of the Hyuuga clan," she demurely corrected. She went on to reassure him, "I can understand the confusion, though, seeing as we look alike. So, don't feel embarrassed."

To cut the awkward tension, the orange-clad girl coughed to get her new friend's attention. "Well, I'm just gonna run and grab your robes, okay? Okay." And with that, she ran off.

CHANGEINPERSPECTIVEBUTNOTSCE NE

Rikudo made to go after her, but a hand on his shoulder stopped him. He tensed at the unfamiliar and unwanted touch and turned to look at the owner, barely restraining his instinctive snarl.

The other man stared hard at him with his strange eyes. The warrior would've thought him blind had he not had such an intense gaze focused on him. "I'd like to get to know you a bit better, '_Riku_.'"

His hackles rose at the tone the Hyuuga used. Not even in the village a day, and already someone doubted his cover. "Is there a problem with my name, Hyuuga-san?" he asked, feigning cluelessness. He was a good actor when he needed to be.

The brunette frowned. "It's a rather unusual name for someone from the desert. In fact, your entire appearance is unusual for a man that's never been away from Suna," he questioned, suspicious–and with good reason.

_Why on Earth would they give me such a terrible cover?_ He thought quickly. "I'm from the edge of the desert, close to the border of your forests, really." He added, to hopefully close the discussion, "I'm actually an orphan, so I can't say for sure if I'm truly a native of Suna." Pale gray eyes were cast down as a modest expression that hinted at self-pity was cast across his face.

As he expected, Hyuuga-san and Hinata-san both rushed to get off the subject, which confirmed his suspicions of their own family issues. The beautiful woman switched to a safer topic, their professions. "I myself am a teacher at this school." She giggled softly, "It's always a little surreal, since I was once a student here as well."

Rikudo could only assume that a "school" was some sort of training facility, but for fear that his ignorance would out him, he refrained from asking any questions on the matter (he could always ask Uchiha or Namikaze-sama later), choosing instead to remark that she seemed to enjoy her job. He turned to look at the other man expectantly.

The man twitched a little, though he couldn't say he knew exactly why. "I'm a shinobi, like Tsuki. My sensei was also her sensei, so we more or less specialize in the same field." He narrowed his eyes at Rikudo. "And, for the record, I don't affiliate myself with anything but the village. _Especially_ not the Hyuuga clan," he stated coolly.

The man nodded, understanding the warning for what it was, and made no comment. The conversation ended with the return of Namikaze-sama.

HOW ABOUT WE DO A BREAKLINE HERE? YEAH? OKAY.

Shikamaru Nara took a long intake of his lit cigarette before looking up towards the sky and releasing the smoke from his mouth. He watched it whirl above carelessly in different forms. It had been years since then and he could still remember that mischievous grin. That smoke bomb of a human was one step closer to cancer but never gave in. Shikamaru could clearly imagine him. Cigar at hand, his messy hair spiked up everywhere, his beard in a better state than ever.

Shikamaru smirked. "It's been 23 years huh, old man."

Beside him, Yasha raised his eyebrows in confusion. "What was that, sensei?"

"Hmm?" Shikamaru tuned back in as he turned to look at the young chunin. "Nothing. Just thinking."

"So, remind me again why we're waiting out here for no apparent reason?" Yasha asked, scratching the smaller dog-Chibi-'s belly. "I mean, the Rokudaime did say to leave as soon as possible, but we're... still here."

Kimiko looked beside them to see the aged Izumo and Kotetsu waving, and then at the curious civilians staring at the four of them. She sighed at the embarrassment.

"Patience is a virtue. No one got anything done without patience."

"Oh, there he goes with the shogi talk," said Rei, waving her hand against the puff of smoke blowing against her.

Shikamaru only took another inhale of his cigarette before tossing it on the ground, and crushing the remains with his sandal. "Alright," he began before walking past the gates of Konohagakure. "Let's go."

Yasha stared at him, wide-eyed, and begged, "Please don't tell me we waited eight minutes here just so you could finish your smoke."

The lack of a reply answered Yasha's question. He gawked and the utter awe at his mentor's actions drove him to senseless stuttering.

"Oh, God, Yasha. You sound like Kimiko on a bad day." Rei quickly turned to Kimiko with a sheepish smile. "No offense, Kimiko-chan."

Shikamaru cooly used the hand that wasn't hidden in his pocket to gesture to his team. "Come on, we're burning good napping time."

YOUR MOM SHOULD MIND HER OWN BUSINESS

"Is there a problem?" Kyouya asked. He leaned against the door of the bathroom stall Riku was locked in. He could hear the struggle his new... acquaintance was going through.

Riku softly unlocked the stall and shrugged indifferently. "It is hard to maneuver in such a small space."

"You good in there, Riku?" Tsuki nonchalantly strolled in. She circled around Riku. Coming to a final conclusion, she nodded. "Yeah, you looked better half-naked."

Before the conversation could proceed any further, a poor sensei with horrible timing walked into the bathroom, ready to relieve himself of the pressure in his bladder, only to jump at the sight of the restroom occupants.

He took one look at Tsuki before he shrieked, "Tsuki-chan, what are you doing in the men's bathroom?!"

She tilted her head and blinked. "Oh, hey, Iruka-sensei! Long time no see!"

"Long time no-" He cut himself off the reflexive greeting and snapped his head to the other two males in the room. "K-Kyouya-san, why would you let her into the men's bathroom?!"

He only shrugged. "You know as well as I do how careless she is."

Iruka's eye twitched at the those words, remembering a not so distant memory of his former student.

He looked back at the girl, feeling the stress from his lower half. "Well, get out of here!" he shouted, chasing her out with his fist in the air.

With the girl away from the men's oasis, Iruka-sensei rushed to the closest urinal and sighed in relief.

Kyouya, completely dumbfounded at the situation, moved his pale gaze to Riku. The man continued to examine the fabric, ignoring the entire situation that just unfolded. Kyouya almost chuckled at his strange behavior.

"WHAT THE HELL IS TAKING Y'ALL SO LONG!" shouted Tsuki with her foot heavily tapping the ground.

The older sensei walked to a nearby sink and turned on the faucet. "You two better get going," he noted as he lathered the soap in his hands, "or she'll come back in here."

BREAKLINEHERECAUSEDILLSAYSSO ANDHE'STHEBOSSYOMAMA

Shikamaru pursed his lips together tightly, humming a small tune. His middle finger tapped against the parchment he held in his hands and his eyes skimmed over each line, carefully and critically. The decision he was about to make would inevitably affect the result of the day. Finally reaching a conclusion, he handed the parchment back to the girl standing above the table.

"Two plates of steamed buns and green tea for the table."

The young waitress bowed politely and left to finish her rounds in the small restaurant of Doki Doki Dumplings.

Yasha growled and tapped his fingers against the wooden table, his sharp nails clacking against the hard material. "So, why the hell are we here eating when we should be on a mission? And don't tell me that 'patience is a virtue' shit."

His sensei only muttered, "No one works well on an empty stomach," before yawning.

Yasha gawked, and Kimiko and Rei prepared for the boisterous argument that was soon to come. However, before the Inuzuka could utter another word, another loud quarrel echoed throughout the thin walls of Doki Doki Dumplings, commanding the attention of everyone within hearing distance.

"WHAT DID YOU SAY, YOU PUNK-ASS KID?" a tall-looking woman yelled, leaping out of her seat and knocking it to the ground. She threw a fist down to the middle of their table, almost smashing it to pieces. Her violent behavior was enough for the workers to quickly avoid approaching the... human?

A red-haired man, with muscles bigger than his head, sunk back further into his seat and quickly stuck a thumb at the man beside him.

The poor victim gaped at his companion and snapped to look at the woman, writhing in anger. His hands instinctively raised in front of him, as if he were defending himself, and stuttered, "W-W-Wait, M-Musha, it's not-"

Instead of hearing his explanation, she grabbed the boy by the front of his shirt and roared, "I'M GONNA KILL YOU, TARO!"

Rei shook her head, and ignored the sound of pleas for forgiveness and painful groans. Instead, she turned back to the shaking waitress who placed the plate of freshly steamed buns in front of her. "And I thought _we _were bad."

"Anyway, what's our plan of attack?" asked Yasha, excitedly. He was ready to get his blood pumping and a good mission was just what he needed. He snatched a bun from the plate and tore pieces for Jindai and Chibi. "Are we going to find those thugs and beat the living snot out of them until they leave? Or do we have to go undercover and work from the inside out?"

Kimiko politely poured the green tea into the handmade tea cups and distributed the drinks to her teammates, whom gratefully accepted it. Shikamaru nodded as he took the tea cup. "Hold your horses, Yasha. Naruto sent me a notice of what he was going to say before _certain_ students of mine made the unfortunate mistake to get in an immature fight with their teammates before listening to their Rokudaime," narrowing his eyes.

His students immediately avoided eye contact.

He sighed and continued, "They need an escort for an important shipment, and since we were given this mission, Naruto thought it'd be less troublesome if we just did it. Now, I want you three to stay here and wait until I come back."

"Wait a minute," Rei interjected. "Why can't we tag along?"

Shikamaru stood up from his seat. "Because I said so. Until I get back, Kimiko's in charge."

The introverted girl dropped her snack in shock. "W-W-Why me?! Shouldn't Rei-chan be the one in charge?"

He shook his head in disappointment. "She would have, but after that stunt this morning? I'm not exactly in a perky mood. Honestly. I expected this much out of Yasha, but Rei, how immature can you get?"

Although, she was unperturbed by this statement, Yasha glared sharply at his sensei. "What is that supposed to mean?"

Kimiko grimaced at his tone. This wasn't going to end well...

Shikamaru dropped his steamed bun on his wooden plate with an obvious loss of appetite. "Yasha-"

"No!" The young Inuzuka boy shook his head. "No, you always say that. Whenever something bad happens, it's always, "I expected this much out of Yasha." What the hell is that supposed to mean? It's like you're always pointing me out as the–the _screw-up_ of the team. Well, I'm sorry I don't meet your standards for prissy clan prodigies."

"Inuzuka Yasha!" Rei warned. She narrowed her eyes dangerously at her teammate. The idiot was on thin ice.

The older man only folded his arms tightly against his chest, showing a sense of authority. "If you're getting this riled up over a little criticism, then you're not fit to be a shinobi. You might as well just hand in that forehead protector." He let out a frustrated growl, and to a third party, it would seem like he was a father dealing with his three children. "Look, we can talk about this some other time if you want to, but I have to go."

"You're going right now?" asked a disbelieved Rei. "But what about our mission?"

"Just wait until I get back. It shouldn't take more than a few hours. Stay within a five mile radius. I don't want you three to get lost or anything troublesome like that."

He quickly paid for the table and disappeared, leaving a trail of dust behind him.

As soon as he was gone, Yasha quickly stood up, rushing to get out of the restaurant, his two dogs in tow.

"Wha-Yasha!" Rei choked, dropping the bun on her plate to follow him.

"Where are you going, Yasha-kun?!" Kimiko panted, rushing to catch up to the two.

He didn't look back but made sure his voice was loud enough to reach his teammates. "I'm going to finish this mission."

Kimiko's eyes widened in shock. "B-But Shikamaru-sensei said-"

Yasha's figure vanished and he suddenly appeared in front of Rei and Kimiko. Rei, being the closest, almost tripped at the sudden close proximity.

He seethed, "Screw what that old man says! Don't you ever get tired of being treated like kids?"

Kimiko gazed at him, worried. "That's his job, Yasha-kun."

"Whatever," he spat. He motioned for his two dogs to follow as he sprinted towards the opposite direction Shikamaru had gone.

Rei and Kimiko reluctantly followed. The Uchiha prodigy gave him a sharp, slanted stare. "And how exactly are you thinking about completing this mission? Do you even have a plan?"

His silence was enough of an answer to tell her they were screwed.

LINEBREAK

"And there's the training field!" said Tsuki, pointing at the distant and large piece of land, surrounded by trees. There were wooden posts with marks of weaponry slashed against the surface, and a few logs that rested against the cool grass. "It's a common place for Konoha shinobi to spar."

Two figures leaped through the trees following another. It seemed like a large chase as the one in the front made hand signals.

Tsuki squinted to get a better look at the evanescent figures already at the training grounds. "Oh hey, I think that's Team Lee training right now."

"Team Lee?" inquired Riku. Tsuki nodded and pointed at the lone girl in the front. "That's Yamanaka Kairi. Her aunt's best friends with Rei's mom. You've already met Fifi." She moved her finger to the pigtailed girl. "The guy beside her is Rock Yuu. He's the son of their sensei, Rock Lee."

Riku nodded, taking the information in like a sponge. "Are there many shinobi in your village?"

Kyouya shrugged loosely. "Although, I've lost count, I would think so. We get a lot of transfers from other villages. Konoha Academy is one of the finest in the land of Fire and the team building exercises we offer have received notable recognition."

"Are you okay?" Tsuki asked. "You look tired."

Riku politely waved her off. "Forgive me, Namikaze-sama. I am merely just surprised at how different our villages are."

"Namikaze-sama?" Kyouya referenced, his suspicions rising. He looked at Tsuki for answers, but she only nervously evaded the unspoken question. Kyouya glared at his kouhai. "Tsuki, why is he calling you-"

BABABADUMDUMBABABADUMDUM

Hyuuga-san openly grimaced as he looked past Rikudo and Namikaze-sama. Rikudo couldn't help the shocking look he openly displayed as he caught sight of a man looking identical to Hyuuga-san, save the clothes and hairstyle.

"Oh great, _you're_ here," Hyuuga-san enunciated as soon as the man and his companion approached them.

"Bitter as ever I see," the doppelgänger said, his voice only one octave higher.

"Hey, Tomo-sempai, Hiruzen-sempai," Namikaze-sama greeted bubbly, no doubt ignorant of the obvious tension hanging over them. She silently nudged Rikudo and pointed at the look-alike. "That's Tomo-sempai, Kyouya-sempai's twin. They don't get along."

"I noticed," Rikudo whispered back.

He could easily tell the difference between the twins when they stood side by side. The physical appearance contrasted by height (Tomo-san was taller by a few centimeters), the hair (Kyouya-san had shaggy short hair, as Tomo-san's was long and roped in a ponytail), and the auras both released. Rikudo couldn't help but feel slightly more comfortable to Tomo's calm nature even though he had spent more time with Kyouya-san.

"We heard about what happened to Team Shikamaru," said the other man Rikudo presumed to be Hiruzen-san. For some reason, this man made him feel a rise of skepticism fumble in his stomach. "When are they dispatching the rescue team?"

Rikudo could feel Namikaze-sama stiffen beside him. "What rescue team?" she choked out.

The worried expression on both their faces disturbed her out even more. "We thought you'd heard already."

"What happened?" she asked, her eyes snapping side to side frantically as she watched the two males.

"Shikamaru-san sent out an emergency message to the Hokage," said Tomo-san.

"Apparently, Rei-chan, Kimiko-san, and Yasha-san have gone missing," Hiruzen-san continued.

In an instant, Namikaze-sama grabbed onto Rikudo and swiftly headed towards the village outskirts.

LINEBREAKAGAINCAUSEICANCAUSE I'MMABOSSNINJA

The blast was painful enough, but the sharp splinters of wood were just icing on the cake. Yasha grunted as his body was thrown against the impenetrable trunk of an aged tree. He closed his eyes to keep the dust from the bombs the bandits were throwing out of his eyes. Beside him, he heard a loud thump and squinted to see one of his teammates at a nearby tree, panting as she threw a grenade into the air in the enemy's direction. Rei glared at him with crazy eyes and asked, "So, how's that plan coming along?"

Sarcasm fully intended.

"Come out, come out, wherever you are!" one of the bandits sang. This one was only one of the hundred bandits they were up against. When they were attacked, it seemed as if they were only fighting against six, but slowly, the number increased until no one could comprehend the count.

Yasha fingered one of his rabies pills and quickly chewed it, adrenaline flooding his veins. He could feel his strength grow as he grabbed onto an oncoming bandit and threw him over the large branches above them.

"It seems as if there are ex-shinobi among the bandits. But where are they coming from?" Kimiko whispered as she bent to the ground, using her Byakugan to find a possible opening.

Rei frowned. "We can't keep hiding forever. If there are shinobi amongst them, then the leader is probably one himself. If we could only get to-"

"Gotcha," a slimey voice whispered into her ear. She yelped as the man wrapped his four mutated arms around her. Yasha held tightly onto Kimiko, who was ready to pounce. She looked up at him and he only pressed a finger to his lips.

Rei struggled to reach into her side pocket as the man carried her away from the tree and towards the group of bandits. Smirking as she finally got a hold of what she needed, she tightened her hold on the kunai and stabbed it into whatever body part was behind her. The man screamed in pain and she quickly spun away to see the kunai hanging out from his right ribs.

"Duck!" warned Yasha as he threw a shuriken or two behind her. He nodded contently after hearing a screech of pain. He and Kimiko ran out behind their tree to join their teammate.

They were surrounded by them, tens, hundreds, all looking as ugly and mutated as the rest. And in a split second, all hell broke loose.

"Rei, to your right!" Yasha managed to spit out, as he held back a bandit with immense strength.

Rei failed to react quickly enough and, instead, felt a rush of pain going through her right arm. Out of spite, she channeled chakra into her left leg and kicked her attacker half a mile away. "Asshole," she muttered, gritting her teeth as she felt the gash in her arm open up.

Kimiko leaped into the air and performed a gracious open side leap to avoid the oncoming ninja stars. She quickly landed next to Yasha and used her kunai to injure the enemy. "It seems as if these bandits have been deformed into monsters giving them... superpowers!"

Rei grit her teeth. "Maybe we should head towards Akamori."

He turned around, flustered. "Are you crazy? That's their hideout! There might be more of them there! And we'd be walking into a trap."

"It's the only safe place for now!" she replied. "Hold on, let me use my Sharin-!"

Before either Yasha or Rei could react, Kimiko had pushed them to the ground with two darts embedded into her neck and upper arm.

"Wha-shit!" Yasha quickly grabbed a hold of Kimiko whose eyes were rolling back. Her body felt heavy and dull, and she couldn't move a muscle. "K-Kimiko!" He panicked, slapping her cheek lightly. "Come on, stay with me!"

Rei threw two exploding smoke grenades, before latching onto Yasha. "We have to get out of here!"

He nodded and gathered the swaying Kimiko into his arms, following Rei to the direction of Akamori village.

When they arrived, it was eerie and it didn't take a second more for them to realize they had, indeed, walked into the bandits' layer. Rei looked behind her and motioned for silence as they weaved carefully and silently around other bandits guarding their village. It was safe to say message of their escape had not yet reached.

Yasha nodded towards a small rundown barn. There was an opening at the back, easy for escaping if they weren't surrounded. Rei quickly stayed at the door until Yasha and Kimiko were safely inside before taking one last look around the premises and following them.

Yasha rested Kimiko against the old hay. "Shhh, it's okay, Kimiko-chan. You're okay." He jumped back and allowed his other teammate room to check her status. He busied himself by standing as watchout, peeking through the cracks of the wood in the barn.

Rei's eyes sharpened harshly and whispered, "She's poisoned."

Yasha could hear Kimiko's soft, wheezing breaths. "Can't you heal her?"

"I'm not a medic-nin. I've only been taught the basics. The best I can do is to wrap her up—but if she doesn't get help soon, she's in trouble."

"Tsk, damn it!" growled a frustrated Yasha.

"A-Are you two okay?" They looked down at the broken girl, her breath staggering with every exhale.

Rei sighed. "Try not to say anything, Kimiko-chan." With a sour look, Rei stood up. "Yasha, we have to get out of here." She quickly started to tend to her own wounds, wrapping bandages around her arm.

He nodded and scanned the area once more, flinching at the sight of a bandit crossing by. "Yeah, I know, but how are we going to get around them? This place is packed and they're bound to come any minute."

"Not everywhere..." muttered Rei. She glanced towards the back exit and concentrated carefully, different scenarios running through her thoughts. There was one plan that completely regarded her with distaste, and while she tried to turn it away, it only stubbornly stayed.

Shouts from the outside could be heard as Yasha duck even further into the barn. They knew of their escape, and it would only be a matter of time.

"...I'll stay here and distract them."

Yasha's attention flew to her. He strongly stated, "No, we're not leaving you. Why can't we just go together?"

She glared. "Trust me, I'm not that fond of this idea either, but if we try to leave together, we won't stand a chance. Besides, you're the fastest runner out of all of us. If anyone can make it back to Konoha, it's you. Kimiko's on a time limit, Yasha. If the poison spreads through, she's a goner."

"_You're_ a goner of we leave you here!" he spat, his jaw tightening from the stress. "How are you going to hold off ten-twenty of them by yourself?!"

She tightened the knotted bandages. "Let me borrow Jindai and Chibi. With their help, we should be able to fool the bandits into thinking they're you and Kimiko." She pointed at the back exit. "I'll lure them towards Lightning. Leave through there and take the woods to get back to Konoha, and get reinforcements."

The voices grew. One of the bandit's strained voice was clear as day. "I think one of them was an Uchiha." She could recognize him as the one who had captured her initially-the spider freak one.

"An Uchiha?" another stated, flabbergasted. "One of those pretty red eyes would make a fortune in the market..."

Rei tightened her hold on her bandage roughly.

Yasha glared. "Did you hear that? If you go out there now, they'll know for sure you're an Uchiha. Who knows what they'll do to you, and you don't even have much chakra left!"

"Damn it, Yasha! We don't have time. I know what I'm doing, trust me. You have to take her and go. _Do you want her to die?_" she stressed harshly.

He cursed and knew he couldn't go against what was best for Kimiko. "Tch, this is gonna sound really cheesy, but if you don't come back alive, I'll bring you back and kill you again."

Yasha didn't wait for her reply and only sprinted into the woods, trying not to think of his teammate's impending doom. He had to get help. That's all that mattered.

Rei glanced back at his retreating form before moving the opposite direction. She quickly pointed to her left. "Jindai, take the left side! Chibi, the right!"

The two dogs obeyed and Rei could hear the new befuddlement of the bandits. She smirked proudly and closed her eyes. The plan had worked. "Now to proceed with the next one."

When she opened her eyes, all she could see was red.

TOBECONTINUEDBITCHES

A: I wish for a review, a Favorite, and/or an Alert. I deem you my genies: GRANT MY WISH.

M: I shall pass the baton onto Dillon.

D: …. oh no... I WILL DO MY VERY BEST!


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